Tag Archives: Alcoholism

MOTHERS AGAINST DRUNK DRIVING (MADD) SUES UBER FOR RISE IN ALCOHOLISM

The Uber logo
The Uber logo

SAN FRANCISCO, California (The Adobo Chronicles) – Mothers Against Drunk Driving (MADD), an international advocacy group fighting against the damaging and oftentimes fatal effects of motorists who drive under the influence (DUI) of alcohol, today announced it was suing the popular ride-sharing company Uber for the sudden rise in alcholism.

The California chapter of MADD claims that people are drinking twice as much alcohol than they were prior to Uber.

Bartenders have confirmed that their customers are now more likely to order a second, third or fourth alcoholic drink because fewer of them drive their cars to the bars.

“The so-called designated driver arrangement never really worked,” according to one bartender at Renegades, a gay bar in San Jose, “because nobody really wanted to have a night out with friends at a bar just drinking orange juice or bottled water.”

“My customers would usually say, ‘I shouldn’t, I’m driving,’ when offered another round of drinks.  Now they don’t think twice about ordering a second glass of wine or cocktail,” he said.

Unofficial figures from police departments across the U.S. and elsewhere seem to show as much as a 50% decline in DUI cases since Uber drivers started hitting the roads. In just the last month, DUI checkpoints have made zero arrests.

Only in California will companies be sued for doing something good!

TEXAS GOVERNOR RICK PERRY ADMITS HE HAS THE HOMOSEXUAL GENES

imageSan Francisco, California (The Adobo Chronicles) – Texas Governor and former presidential candidate Rick Perry has just endeared himself to the homosexual community.

In a speech before members of the Commonweath Club of California, Perry admitted that in the same way he has the genetic makeup to become an alcoholic, he also has the genes to become a latent homosexual. Perry’s comments all but confirm his belief that the gay lifestyle is not a choice.

“I (may) have the genetic coding (that I’m inclined) to be an alcoholic, but (and) I have the desire  not  to do that, and I look at the homosexual issue the same way,” Perry said in his San Francisco speech. The governor however refused to reveal a timeline in which he will act upon his gay genes.

The Log Cabin Republicans, the lgbt group within the GOP, immediately praised Perry and vowed to fully endorse his candidacy should he decide again to run for president in 2016.

The San Francisco Pride Committee convened an emergency meeting last night and unanimously voted to make Perry an honorary grand marshall at this month’s pride parade and celebration.