Category Archives: Religion

Leni Robredo To Sue Francis Baraan IV For Attempted Murder!

QUEZON CITY, Philippines (The Adobo Chronicles, Quezon City Bureau) – Vice President Leni Robredo has just filed a lawsuit against blogger Francis Baraan IV for attempted murder.

The lawsuit stems from a tweet by Baraan in which he said that Robredo should be canonized as a saint. He even asked Saint Leni to “hear our prayers.”

It is common knowledge that only dead people are canonized saints.

WHITE HOUSE UNDERGOES DISINFECTION, EXORCISM!

WASHINGTON, D.C. (The Adobo Chronicles, Washington Bureau) – Hours after Donald Trump left, sources tell The Adobo Chronicles that The White House underwent an extensive disinfection in preparation for the arrival of its new occupant, President Joe Biden.

The disinfection was considered standard protocol, especially considering that the Trump family as well as key staff had tested positive for the coronavirus.

But in addition to the disinfection, the Presidential residence also went through exorcism to ensure that evil spirits are banished in time before Biden, a Catholic, moved in.

“We hope that all sources of possible infection as well as negativity were taken care of by the twin moves,” a White House spokesperson said.

Starting fresh…

Filipino Catholics Urged To Pray 10 Hail Mary’s, 10 Our Tatay’s For Covid Healing

MANILA, Philippines (The Adobo Chronicles, Manila Bureau) – The Catholic Church has urged Filipinos to turn to daily prayer for the country’s healing from the Covid-19 pandemic.

As of this writing, the country has seen well over 100,000 confirmed Covid cases and more than 2,000 deaths.  It is also now in its 5th month of lockdowns.

Catholic bishops are asking the Catholic Faithful to pray 10 Hail Mary’s at noon every day starting August 15 to ask that the Philippines be healed from the scourge brought about by the coronavirus.

In addition, the bishops also asked Filipinios to pray 10  Our Tatay’s (Our Father) for an end to all community quarantines and lockdowns across the country. It was in reference to Philippine President Rodrigo Roa Duterte who is fondly called ‘Tatay Digong’ by many.

The power of prayer.

’Our father, who art in Malacañang…’