Category Archives: Health & Medicine

WHITE HOUSE UNDERGOES DISINFECTION, EXORCISM!

WASHINGTON, D.C. (The Adobo Chronicles, Washington Bureau) – Hours after Donald Trump left, sources tell The Adobo Chronicles that The White House underwent an extensive disinfection in preparation for the arrival of its new occupant, President Joe Biden.

The disinfection was considered standard protocol, especially considering that the Trump family as well as key staff had tested positive for the coronavirus.

But in addition to the disinfection, the Presidential residence also went through exorcism to ensure that evil spirits are banished in time before Biden, a Catholic, moved in.

“We hope that all sources of possible infection as well as negativity were taken care of by the twin moves,” a White House spokesperson said.

Starting fresh…

HOUSE APPROVES NEW FILIPINO WAY OF GREETING

MANILA, Philippines (The Adobo Chronicles, Manila Bureau) – The Philippines’ House of Representatives has approved a bill institutionalizing a new Filipino way of greeting. This, in lieu of handshakes which could potentially spread the coronavirus.

The bill mandates not one, but two alternative greetings:

One is the “pabebe” hand wave popularized by famous celebrity pair AlDub. The other is the Miss Universe hand wave.

So, you can choose your fancy, but no more handshakes!

Philippines Leads The WorLd In Covid-19 Vaccinations


MANILA, Philippines (The Adobo Chronicles, Manila Bureau) – The Philippines holds the rare distinction of being the world’s leader when it comes to Covid-19 vaccines.

While many countries, including the U.S., U.K., Singapore, United Arab Emirates and others are now just beginning to issue Emergency Use Authorizations (EUE) and rolling out the vaccines to their populations, the Philippines is already holding Congressional hearings. No other country is doing this courageous and heroic effort by the Filipino Representatives and Senators to ensure the health and safety of their constituents.

Talk about advanced thinking!