Category Archives: Health & Medicine

NoyNoy Aquino Defends His Dengue Vaccination Program

761F0D06-CFE0-4884-A133-538DB34C69FC.jpegMANILA, Philippines (The Adobo Chronicles, Manila Bureau) – One of the big questions now facing ex-President NoyNoy Aquino and his administration’s Department of Health is why school children vaccinated with the bungled vaccine, Dengvaxia, were not pre-screened for previous Dengue infection or for pre-existing conditions like autoimmune disease.

Current information now points to the fact that Dengvaxia vaccination for those who have not had a previous Dengue infection, as well as for those with autoimmune disease shouldn’t have happened without pre-screening. 

Sanofi has admitted that Dengvaxia could cause severe effects for those who have not had Dengue previously.  Also, because Dengvaxia is a ‘live’ (attenuated) vaccine, it could bring about serious, adverse affects for those with autoimmune disorders like lupus, HIV/AIDS or even rheumatoid arthritis.

The Adobo Chronicles caught up with Aquino at his residence in Quezon City as he was enjoying a cigarette in his front yard, and we asked him for his comment.

Aquino said that he stands by his decision to have authorized the Dengue vaccination program, saying he did it in ‘good faith.’

‘All the while, I thought that pre-screening meant pre-election, and so I authorized the launch of the vaccination program in time for the May 2016 elections to ensure the victory of the Liberal Party. No one told me about the need to pre-screen children for seropositivity for Dengue or for autoimmune disease.”

Now we know.

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Trump White House Fires Remaining Members Of Advisory HIV/AIDS Council, Seeks New Applicants

 

WASHINGTON, D.C. (The Adobo Chronicles, Washington Bureau) – On the eve of the eve of New Year’s eve, President Donald Trump fired all the remaining members of the Presidential Council on HIV/AIDS, months after about half a dozen members resigned in protest of Trump’s position on health poilicies.

At the same time, The White House announced that applications to fill the vacant seats are now being accepted, with very strict qualifications for those wanting to serve in the council.

Among other things, applicants must pledge, as part of their cover letter, that they will never ever use these seven “banned” words in line with Trump’s overall health policy:

  • Transgender
  • Science-based
  • Evidence-based
  • Fetus
  • Entitlement
  • Vulnerable
  • Diversity

So if you’re interested in a White House Council seat, and ready to erase the seven words from your vocabulary, send your resume to 1600 Pennsylvannia Avenue, Attn: Seven Banned Words.

Selfitis (Fake Disease) Triggers Scientific Research At UK’s Trent University (True)

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SAN FRANCISCO, California (The Adobo Chronicles, San Francisco Bureau) – Three years ago, The Adobo Chronicles reported that the American Psychiatric Association (APA) has classified the taking of ‘selfies’ as a mental disorder called ‘selfitis.’

We, of course, made it all up.

But what’s not made up is a scientific research conducted by the UK’s Trent University which concluded that your selfie obsession is real, but your selfitis is fake.