Tag Archives: Airlines

UNITED AIRLINES WILL OFFER ‘ECONOMY MINUS’ SEATS FOR HALF PRICE

imageCHICAGO, Illinois (The Adobo Chronicles) – The same U.S. airline that started the ‘economy plus’ seats in its aircraft main cabin is about to take back that extra legroom in favor of ‘economy minus’ seats — for half the airfare.

UNITED Airlines (UAL) started offering its economy plus seats with more legroom some 15 years ago for passengers willing to pay extra as well as to reward its frequent fliers.

Beginning on Valentine’s Day, February 14, 2015, UAL passengers will have the option to book economy minus seats for a 50% discount. These seats will have 50% less legroom compared to the already cramped regular economy seats.  Furthermore, the economy minus seat backs will not recline and there will be no tray tables that fold down for meals or to set laptops and other portable devices on.

“It’s a win-win situation, ” a UNITED spokesperson said. “Passengers will see significant savings, and UAL will be able to increase the number of seats and generate more revenue.”

The Adobo Chronicles learned that non-alcoholic beverages and peanuts will still be complimentary, but economy minus passengers purchasing meals on board will have to set their food on their laps. UNITED will not be responsible for food items that may fall off passenger laps in the event of unexpected turbulence.

CONGRESS MULLS STIFF PENALTY FOR PASSENGERS CAUSING FLIGHT DIVERSIONS OVER LEGROOM ISSUES

imageWashington, D.C. (The Adobo Chronicles) – In just the last couple of weeks, three U.S. airline flights were diverted and delayed due to issues involving irate passengers making a big fit over legroom.

In the latest incident, a Delta Airlines flight from New York’s LaGuardia Airport to West Palm Beach, Florida, was forced to land in Jacksonville, Florida, after a passenger became violent when the woman sitting in front of her tried to recline her seat.

To curb the growing reclining seat incidents on board U.S. flights, a bill has been proposed in Congress to set a very stiff penalty to any passenger who causes a flight delay or diversion.

House  Speaker John Boehner said that these diversions are costing taxpayers a lot of money while inconveniencing flight travelers, especially Republican legislators and lobbyists who have to make frequent trips to and from Washington, D.C. as well as to their local districts to attend political fundraisers.

When asked about the penalty, Boehner said, “Anyone found guilty of a legroom-related flight diversion will be put on a plane to Japan and back, strapped to the middle seat of a plane chartered by Sumo wrestlers.

The proposed bill appears to have full bi-partisan backing.

 

 

 

TOP TEN THINGS YOU’LL NEED UPON LANDING AT NINOY AQUINO INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT

imageManila, Philippines (The Adobo Chronicles) – The murdered Filipino opposition leader must be turning and twisting in his grave as the international airport named after him has gained the reputation as the worst in the world. Manila’s Ninoy Aquino International Airport (NAIA) has been the subject of ridicule in recent months not only for overcrowding, confusing signage or lack thereof, clueless airport personnel, and most of all, non-functioning airconditioning units.

As of press time, new airconditioning units  have reportedly arrived but it is no guarantee that incoming and outgoing passengers will keep their cool.

As a stop-gap measure, the Philippines’ Airports Authority issued a travel advisory recommending the top ten things traveling passengers will need upon disembarkation:

1. Anahaw (wicker) fans. They’re relatively inexpensive. Foreigners can easily borrow these from their Filipino friends and neighbors. They are also sold at NAIA concession stands.

2. If you want to go high tech, you can purchase battery-operated personal fans from almost every mall in America and elsewhere.

3. Cotton towel, to wipe your sweat and keep you dry at all times, especially while in line at the immigration, customs and baggage claim areas.

4. Plastic spray bottle. Make sure to fill it up with water before de-planing. You will need to squirt some mist on your face every minute or so.

5. Deodorant. Be courteous to your fellow incoming passengers.

6. Perfume. Make it a Prada. Filipinos love designer stuff

7. Face mask. It will not only protect you from airborne viruses, but from the stench of sweat all around you.

8. Bikini top for women. Think of it as entering a dry sauna.  And make it Victoria’s Secret. Filipinos love designer stuff.

9. Bikini bottom for men. Make it Calvin Klein. Filipinos love designer stuff.

10. Ice-cold bottled water. Not just any bottled water. Make it a Fiji. Did we already mention Filipinos love designer stuff?

Mabuhay! Welcome to Manila, you know, the place novelist Dan Brown calls “the gates of hell.”