Category Archives: Politics

SUPREME COURT JUSTICE SONIA SOTOMAYOR ADMITS BEING A CLOSETED CONSERVATIVE

imageSalt Lake City, Utah –  The U.S. Supreme Court just handed down an order staying a Utah lower court’s decision recognizing that the Constitution forbids marriage discrimination . Though Utah requested that Justice Sonia Sotomayor issue the stay on her own, the Court’s order indicates that she referred the decision to the full Court. No justice indicated a dissent, although that does not necessarily mean that all nine justices would have granted the stay.

Today’s decision which put same-sex marriages in Utah on hold, upset many in the lgbt community and activists in the marriage equality movement, especially because they always thought that Sotomayor, an Obama appointee, was an ally and considered her one of the radical justices on the Supreme Court.

In a statement issued late today, Sotomayor admitted that she is actually a closeted conservative and that she regrets having misled those in the U.S. Senate who voted for her confirmation thinking she was pro-women’s rights, pro-gay rights, pro-abortion, and pro-everything radical.

The presumptive lgbt lead organization, the Human Rights  Campaign, is still crafting its response to the Sotomayor announcement. Stay tuned.

GOVERNMENTS TO PHASE OUT PASSPORTS AS WE KNOW IT

imageNew York, New York – If pets can have it, why can’t humans?  With this common sense-question before it, a top-level immigration sub-committee of the United  Nations is busy drafting an international code that would all but eliminate passports as we know it.

Currently, most countries issue and require machine-readable passports as part of their immigration laws. These passports have greatly facilitated entry procedures worldwide by a simple scan of the travel documents.

The new code will instead require travelers and citizens to have their citizenship and residency information stored in microchips implanted in their forearms. It would be similar to microchips implanted in pets.

The sub-committee members said that this technonogical change would not only reduce long lines at ports of entry at airports, border checkpoints and disembarking piers worldwide, but also reduce the incidence of fake passports which continue to be a big problem.

Visa information, if required, would also be incorporated into the microchips. Any updates or change in personal information and status can be easily changed by logging on to the Internet with a unique password provided by the issuing government agency.

The new rules are expected to be in effect by January 1, 2016.  Have a microchip? Will travel!

GOOGLE TRYING TO COURT FUGITIVE EDWARD SNOWDEN

imageMountain View, California –  Will 2014 prove to be a banner year for American fugitive Edward Snowden?  Mr. Snowden is now living in Russia, on the run from American charges of espionage and theft relating the National Security Agency top secret leaks.

First, The New York Times Editorial Board published an op-ed piece calling for an offer of clemency or plea bargain for Mr. Snowden, considering the value of his leaks and the N.S.A. abuse he has exposed.

Now, the country’s premier tech company Google is reportedly in secret negotiations with Snowden, offering him a hefty-paying position in Mountain View upon his return to the U.S.

The Adobo Chronicles has learned that Google has hit a snag and plateau in terms of the marketing of its much-ballyhooed product, the Google Glass.  “Obviously, we needed a recognizable and controversial face to model our product, and what could be a better choice than Snowden,” said Google CEO Larry Page.  “He’s also easy on the eyes, and the Google Glass fits perfectly on the well-defined contours of his face,” Page added.

Analysts, however,  suspect that having Mr. Snowden be the model for the Google Glass is just a front, and that Google’s real intention is to make Snowden the chief of its Internet Surveillance Department which would monitor any secret or unauthorized intrusion by the N.S.A. into Google’s data system.