Category Archives: Entertainment

Adobo Chronicles’ Suggested ECQ Home Activities

BAGUIO CITY, Philippines (The Adobo Chronicles, Baguio Bureau) –It’s been over 40 days since the government put in place an Enhanced Community Quarantine (ECQ) throughout the entire island of Luzon.

You’ve scrubbed all your pots and pans, your toilet is squeaky clean, your closet has been organized in a way it has never been before in your entire life. So what is left to do to while away the remaining hours and days of your home confinement?

In the interest of public service, The Adobo Chronicles is sharing this to-do list put together by our home and social experts to keep you from losing your otherwise elite composure, or your sanity during this period of ECQ:

  • Remember your collection of torn denim pants? They’ll probably go out of fashion when this Covid-19 crisis is over.  Patch them all up. It’ll lessen entry points for the virus.
  • While you’re at it, sew up all the holes in your pairs of socks.
  • Time to clean up the molds on your collection of shoes!
  • You may have missed cleaning the Last Supper painting and giant spoon and fork woodcarving hanging on your wall. Dust them up!
  • You’ve been receiving tons of Facebook friend request lately, haven’t you? Accept them all — common friend or no common friend — then go back and unfriend them one by one. Then repeat.
  • It’s time to delete all those embarrassing photos of yourself that you have posted on your Facebook page.
  • Now is a good time to check the expiry dates of the cans and cans of sardines, pork and beans, and soups in your cupboard. And don’t forget the cartons of orange juice and milk in your fridge!
  • Haven’t you had enough collection of empty cardboard and styrofoam boxes you saved from your takeout meals? You know what to do. And don’t forget your collection of used plastic spoons and forks.
  • You’ve had the plastic covering on your couch and dining chairs long enough. Discard them! They may be harboring unwanted viruses and bacteria!
  • How many jars of spare coins do you have sitting on top of your credenza? Roll them up by denomination and give them to the homeless.  They especially need them in this time of crisis.
  • When was the last time you gave your Shih Tzu a bath?

Do you have other suggested activities? Let us know in the comments section. We’re in this together. We heal as one!

Celebrities Increasingly Face “Your Mom “ Jokes

by Zane Lee-Briggs

A recent trend at the Oscars and Grammys was the young stars bringing their mothers as guests to the events. The public figures and their mothers would even go as far as to take pictures together on the red carpet.

However nice and warm-hearted this may be, a new research study shows that this plan of action can not be recommended. “You see, celebrities bringing their mothers to these things puts them at an exceedingly high risk falling victim to “Your Mom” jokes,” said Princeton researcher Joseph Walker. “And that just can not happen. It would be a PR nightmare.” He concluded. Since hearing about this, celebrities around the nation have been quick to take Dr. Walker’s advice, and have gone to great measures to assure that they will never fall victim to a career-ending Your Mom joke.

Zane Lee-Briggs is a young satirist with special interests politics, philosophy, and your mom jokes. He also has a persistent tendency to not take anything seriously. If you have a sacred cow, chances are Zane has already turned it into a nice piece of steak. His website can be found at http://www.levitymagazine.com

MARCELITO POMOY: It’s A Tie For AGT Champion!

SAN FRANCISCO, California (The Adobo Chronicles, San Francisco Bureau) – The super fans have made their decision which will be made public during Monday night’s telecast of the America’s Got Talent, and the announcement of grand champion.

Semi-reliable sources close to Simon Cowell and the production team of the popular reality TV show told The Adobo Chronicles that it’s a tie!

Marcelito Pomoy and his female voice partner got equal number of votes to earn them the title of champion.

Well, you can’t honor the beast without honoring the beauty, can you?