Welcome to Baguio’s latest attraction: The Guzzle and Gobble Paradise! Feast on mystery meat delicacies and guzzle bottomless “fruit” cocktails.

But temper your expectations — those video monitors? They play nothing but wholesome music videos. No x-rated films here, just the soothing tunes of yesteryears.

And a word of caution: read the marquee carefully. It’s not a “house of ill repute,” it’s a house of all you can eat!

Join us for an evening of mild entertainment and culinary surprises, where the only thing scandalous is the ketchup-to-mayo ratio on your fries.