Category Archives: Politics

SURVEY: NINETY FIVE PERCENT OF AMERICANS CAN’T NAME THEIR VICE PRESIDENT, LT. GOVERNOR

July 24, 2014 Pol Pinoy 2 Comments

San Jose, California (The Adobo Chronicles) – Quick, without googling it: who is your state’s lieutenant governor? Apparently 95% of Americans don’t know who their lieutenant governors are. Worse, the same Americans can’t name the Vice President of the United States.

In a new survey conducted by The Adobo Chronicles, only 5% of the 1,000 individuals questioned knew who their lieutenant governor is. The same 5% also correctly named Joe Biden as the sitting Vice President. Not surprisingly, all of those who answered correctly were newly-naturalized citizens who recently took and passed the U.S. citizenship exam.

As a bonus question, the survey asked respondents if they knew who LeBron James and Kim Kardashian were. One hundred percent answered in the affirmative.

The survey has margin of error of plus or minus three percent.

Business, Health & Medicine, Politics

U.S. COSMETIC COMPANIES SCRAMBLE TO GET HILLARY CLINTON’S ENDORSEMENT

July 23, 2014 Pol Pinoy Leave a comment

Silicon Valley, California (The Adobo Chronicles) – As part of a tour for her new book Hard Choices, former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton treated the Internet to a Q&A while visiting some of the biggest companies in Silicon Valley.

One of the most talked-about questions was: “What advice would you give to young women who are considering a career in politics/public service?”

Clinton responded by saying that women in the public arena should “grow skin as thick as the hide of a rhinoceros,” adding, “I have certainly, as you can tell, have had to learn how to do that. There’s a lot of good moisturizers I can tell you about if you’re interested.”

Soon after, the former First Lady and presumptive 2016 presidential candidate received dozens of text messages from cosmetic companies asking if she would endorse their moisturizing products. In return, the companies promised full financial backing for her presidential campaign.

Among those that contacted Clinton were manufacturers of the brands Olay, Avon, L’Oreal, Neutrogena, Nivea, Estee Lauder and Shiseido.

Clinton and her consultants are still reportedly studying the endorsement offers. “We have some time between now and the start of the 2016 campaign season,” they said.

Human Interest, International, Law Enforcement, Military, Politics

TEXAS GOVERNOR RICK PERRY VOLUNTEERS TO PATROL U.S.-MEXICO BORDER

July 22, 2014 Pol Pinoy Leave a comment

Perry on his first day as volunteer border patrol officer

Austin, Texas (The Adobo Chronicles) – Rick Perry is taking a leave of absence as governor of Texas to volunteer as a patrol officer along the U.S.- Mexico border.

In a press statement issued shortly before leaving his office to assume his volunteer duties, Perry said that he is sick and tired of waiting for the federal government to send more troops to stop the increased border crossings of undocumented immigrants from South and Central America, including hundreds of unaccompanied children.

In a brilliant move that could earn him the Republican nomination for president in 2016, Perry’s last act before his leave of absence was to send 1,000 Texas national guard troops not only to patrol the border, but to protect him as he performs his volunteer work.

During Perry’s leave of absence, the lieutenant governor will assume the role of Texas governor. Staff of the governor’s office, however, couldn’t exactly remember who the current Lt. Governor is, but at least they know his first name is David.