Category Archives: Politics

Government, International, Military, Politics

TOP 10 REASONS THERE WILL NEVER BE A WOMAN U.S. PRESIDENT

1 Comment

imageSAN FRANCISCO, California (The Adobo Chronicles) – Now that Hillary Clinton has officially declared she is running for president in 2016,  the political and media circles have begun the unending debate on whether or not America is ready for a woman President.

We at The Adobo Chronicles maintain that there will never ever be a woman president in the U.S., and here’s why:

  1. There is no official title for a woman president’s husband at The White House.
  2. The American military will never take orders from a woman Commander-in-Chief.
  3. The White House has never dealt with maternity leave for as long as we all can remember.
  4. Presidents are fitted with dark suits, not dark pantsuits.
  5. Air Force One does not have a stall, only a urinal, for the bathroom on board. Marine One does not have a bathroom at all.
  6.  Our founding fathers didn’t have mothers in mind when they established the Union.
  7. There cannot be two women in the White House kitchen. The current executive chef is already a woman, Filipina-American Cristeta Comerford.
  8. A woman president can take a 3 a.m. call in her pajamas, but will always be late for a 7 a.m. meeting or appointment.
  9. Politicians and the media will never criticize a woman president, lest they be accused of being sexist.
  10. We do not want a repeat of that international embarassment when George W. Bush was caught on camera giving German Chancellor Angela Merkel a back rub. We would not allow that to happen to our woman president!
Politics

REPUBLICAN PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATE RAND PAUL SAYS HE IS PART HISPANIC

Leave a comment
Paul
Paul

LOUISVILLE, Kentucky (The Adobo Chronicles) – It has become clear that the Republican strategy to regain The White House in the 2106 U.S. presidential elections is to field Hispanic candidates, a testament to the growing political clout of what has always been considered a minority population in the U.S.

The latest Republican to declare his candidacy for president is Marco Rubio, junior senator from Florida.  He is of Cuban descent. Before him, the first to announce his candidacy was Ted Cruz, junior senator from Texas, born in Canada to an American mother and a Cuban father.

Although Jeb Bush, former Florida governor, has not yet officially declared his candidacy, he, too, is Hispanic– a Mexican-American — according to his 2009 voter registration.

So that leaves the other declared Republic candidate, Rand Paul, junior senator from Kentucky, and the only non-Hispanic candidate thus far.

Not too fast.

Today, speaking at town hall meeting in Louisville, Kentucky, Paul told his audience that he is part Hispanic.  He cited his family history, noting that the Paul family resided in Lake Jackson, Texas.

Lake Jackson is one of the nine towns comprising the coastal community of the Brazosport Area in Texas.  Brazosport was part of Mexico back in the early 1800s before Samuel “Sam” Houston, American politician and soldier, defeated Mexico’s General Santa Anna in the Battle of San Jacinto, securing the independence of Texas from Mexico.

So there you have it. Four declared (and semi-declared) Republican candidates for president.  Hispanics all.

 

 

Government, Health & Medicine, Politics

HILLARY CLINTON OFFICIALLY DECLARES CANDIDACY; NOYNOY AQUINO OFFICIALLY CHANGES HIS CIGARETTE BRAND

1 Comment

imageMANILA, Philippines (The Adobo Chronicles) – “Every day, America needs a champion, and I wanna be that champion.” With those words, former First Lady Hillary Clinton officially declared her candidacy in the 2016 U.S. presidential elections.

Inspired by those very same words, Philippines President NoyNoy Aquino — a known chain smoker — officially changed his brand of cigarettes to Champion. Not just any Champion, but Mild Menthol Champion, imported from the United States.

An Aquino spokesperson said that by changing his brand and riding on the popularity of Hillary, the president expects a significant improvement in his approval ratings which have been on the decline lately.

Puff away, Mr. President!