AMBER ALERT ISSUED! EBOLA CZAR IS MISSING.

Klain
Klain

Washington, D.C. (The Adobo Chronicles) – The Amber Alert, a U.S. emergency response system, is exclusively designed to deal with child abduction cases. But for the first time, the Federal government has used the system and issued a missing person report for an adult — no less than President Barack Obama’s newly-appointed Ebola Czar.

Since Ron Klain officially started his job on October 22, he has not been seen or heard of. Even reporters at White House briefings have asked questions like: “What’s Ron Klain doing?” or “Is he accomplishing what he was appointed to do?”  or “What has he done?”  As for the visibly scared American public, the bigger question is : “Where is the Ebola Czar?”

White House press secretary Josh Earnest has explained repeatedly that Klain’s work would principally be “behind the scenes,” offering broad, bland descriptions of his work.

But national law enforcement agencies are not taking Earnest’s words in stride and have issued a national Amber Alert, asking Americans (and non-Americans) to help find Klain.  The public is advised to call their nearest police department if they have any sighting of Klain or someone who looks like Klain.

Although the Ebola scare perpetuated by politicians and the media have remained just that — a scare — the national government is not taking any chances in case Klain has been abducted by aliens or by Ebola ghosts.

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EBOLA DETRACTORS – WHERE ARE THEY NOW?

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San Jose, California (The Adobo Chronicles) – Nevermind the science.

Donald Trump wanted to ban all incoming flights from Africa.  Ann Coulter called the U.S. doctor who treated Ebola patients in West Africa “idotic.”

The states of New York and New Jersey implemented a mandatory quarantine for anyone arriving at their airports  suspected of carrying the Ebola virus. Maine had deployed state police to monitor symptom-less nurse Kaci Hickox when she arrived in the state after spending time in a quarantine tent in New Jersey.

Republicans in Senate battleground races including Kansas, North Carolina and Colorado have called for travel restrictions against countries where the Ebola virus has spread in West African countries.

Network and cable news channels had no shortage of Ebola segments, even dissecting the hazmat suit to prove fluids can still leak through and spread the virus.

By golly, the President of the United States even appointed an Ebola Czar: an attorney!

Americans cowered in fear. Armageddon was coming!

So, why is there an eerie silence now?  Where are the Ebola detractors?

Oh, that’s right, they’re all getting ready to count the votes in tomorrow’s mid-term elections.

What about Ebola?

Nah, they all knew it wasn’t a real threat. But it had to be overblown to increase their protégés’ chances of getting elected. Tomorrow.

Yes, tomorrow, get out and VOTE!

 

 

MORE FUN IN THE PHILIPPINES: NEW CAR BUYERS MUST ALSO PURCHASE PARKING SPACE

imageManila, Philippines (The Adobo Chronicles) – The average cost to purchase a brand new car in the Philippines is 800,000 Pesos (approximately $18,000). Now, if a new bill in Congress is passed, it would cost the car buyer more than double that amount.

The reason?  No one will be allowed to buy a new car if there is no space to park it.

House Bill No. 5098 or The Proof of Parking Space Act, which was filed by Valenzuela City Rep. Sherwin Gatchalian, requires buyers of brand new cars “to execute an affidavit indicating the availability of existing parking space for the vehicle to be bought.”

The proposal is aimed at preventing cars from being indiscriminately parked in streets which is one of the factors that contribute to Metro Manila’s nightmarish traffic problem.

In anticipation of the bill’s passage, Toyota Motors which sells the most number of new cars in the Philippines, has  come up with a new buyers’ program whereby the cost of a new vehicle already includes a guaranteed parking space at the buyer’s choice of location. It’s a two for one deal that would start at 1.5 Million Pesos, depending on the car model chosen.

So, Toyota is not only in the car business. It is now also a real estate agent.

Another proof that ‘It’s More Fun in the Philippines!’

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