Senator-elect Robin Padilla Cancels Both Leni Robredo and Kiko Pangilinan!

MANILA, Philippines (The Adobo Chronicles, Manila Bureau) – When is all said and done, the Filipino people will finally realize that the cancel culture espoused by the political opposition really works!

Nowhere is this cancel culture more evident than in the results of the 2022 Philippine elections.

Latest unofficial count shows Vice President Leni Robredo and Senator Kiko Pangilinan at a far distant second to the UniTeam’s tandem of Bongbong Marcos and Inday Sara Duterte.

Meanwhile, top vote-getter in the senatorial race, actor Robin Padilla has garnered more than 26 million votes, per official tally.

In other words, Robredo’s and Pangilinan’s combined total votes is LESS than Pandilla’s:

Senator-elect Risa Hontiveros to Propose Color-coding of National ID!

MANILA, Philippines (The Adobo Chronicles, Manila Bureau) – Risa Hontiveros, the lone opposition candidate to make it to the magic 12 in the 2022 senatorial elections wants to color-code the national ID.

The reelectionist senator told The Adobo Chroniclers that one of her priority bills in the incoming Senate would to be propose to the Philippine Statistics Authority (PSA) to use appropriate ID colors to reflect the political orientation of the ID holder.

For example, she says, Filipinos who support the opposition, should have the background color of their IDs to be pink while those who identify themselves with the UniTeam should have their IDs colored red. Filipinos who decline to state their political affiliation should have their IDs colored white, Hontiveros said.

As of press time, the PSA has not responded to our calls for comment.

Sara Duterte To Mandate Satire as a Required Subject in All PH Schools!

DAVAO CITY, Philippines (The Adobo Chronicles, Davao Bureau) – Presumptive Vice President Inday Sara Duterte has been designated by Presumptive President Bongbong Marcos as his Secretary of the Department of Education (DepEd).

In an exclusive interview with The Adobo Chronicles, Duterte said that within her first 100 days in office as DepEd Secretary, she will mandate that all high schools and universities in the Philippines must include satire as a required subject.

Duterte lamented the fact that despite Filipinos being among the most Internet and social media savvy in the world, many still don’t recognize or understand satire. She says even Maria Ressa and Rappler can’t tell the difference between satire and fake news, notwithstanding the fact that the least-trusted news brand in the Philippines headed by a convicted criminal is, itself, accused of being a purveyor of fake news and of being a propagandist for the country’s political opposition.

At the same time, Duterte congratulated The Adobo Chronicles for being ranked No. 17 among the world’s satire sites. It is the only Filipino American site included in the list.

Duterte also appealed to Facebook and its fact checkers in the Philippines to do their homework and perhaps take a refresher course on satire, parody and sarcasm which are all universally-recognized forms of literature protected under free speech.

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