The Kings And Queens Of The Philippines

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MANILA, Philippines (The Adobo Chronicles, Manila Bureau) – Now that ‘Sunday Beauty Queen’ has been named best picture of the Metro Manila Film Festival, it’s time to name the Kings and Queens of the Philippines, based on their impact on the events of 2016.

President Duterte:    Mura King

President Duterte: Pu King (short for P*tang *na)

Senator Leila de Lima: Dakdak Queen

Vice President Robredo: Dakdak Queen II

Vice President Robredo: Long Distance Queen

General Bato: King Tokhang

Senator Trillanes: Bu King

Mocha Uson: Blog Queen

Cynthia Patag: Laos Queen (not the country)

Raissa Robles: Reklamo Queen

Sass Rogando Sassot: Pisass (Pizzazz) Queen

Kris Aquino, retired: Queen of No Media

Ferdinand E. Marcos: Libing King

Yellow Forces, Coalition Against the Return of the Marcoses to Malacañang (CARMM), Black Friday Movement:  Hukay Kings and Queens

Renato Reyes (Bagong Alyansang Makabayan Secretary General): Rally King

Former President Fidel Ramos: King Kingan

Loida Nicolas-Lewis: Di Maka Move-on Queen

Loida Nicolas-Lewis: Long Distance Queen II

Korina Sanchez: Atraso Queen  (wait lang kayo, ha)

Former President NoyNoy Aquino: King Inangyan

Mar Roxas: King Inangyan II

Did we miss anyone?  Please add them in the comments section.

Happy New Year, all ye Kings and Queens!

Senator De Lima: I Am The New Jose Rizal

img_8022MANILA, Philippines (The Adobo Chronicles, Manila Bureau)- How many more lives must be sacrificed before the people would act and put an end to violence in the society? This was the message of Senator Leila de Lima on the observace of Dr. Jose Rizal day today in the Philippines. Rizal is the country’s national hero.

The lady senator, a harsh critic of President Rodrigo Durtete, likened herself to the national hero, saying, “Mamamatay akong hindi man lang makikita ang ninging ng bukang-liwayway sa aking Bayan.” (I will die without seeing the break of day in my country.) It was actually a quote from Rizal’s famous book, “Noli Me Tangere:” (Touch Me Not).

“Just like Rizal was persecuted for his defiance of the abuses of the Spanish colonizers, I am being persecuted for my lone defiance of the abuses of the Duterte administration. I have been called names, accused of all sorts of things, tried in public and threatened with imprisonment, and I suspect even death,” the senator said.

“And just like Rizal, I will not be touched and if I die, I will die a hero. I have even been given an award in the United States for standing up to Duterte. That must mean something as far as heroism is concerned.”

Duterte, Robredo, De Lima, Marcos Sign Unity Accord!

IMG_8012.PNGMANILA, Philippines (The Adobo Chronicles, Manila Bureau) – In a rare and unexpected development, the Philippines’ top political adversaries have banded together and signed a unity accord, virtually dismantling what was once known as the “opposition.”

It shocked even the closest allies of Duterte, but it was devastating news for the likes of former President NoyNoy Aquino, defeated presidential candidate Mar Roxas, Senator Alfonso Trillanes and FilAm millionaire Loida Nicolas-Lewis.

The unity accord all but crushed the “oust Duterte” movement and paved the way for six years of harmony and understanding which many saw as the key to the country’s progress.

President Rodrigo Duterte, VP Leni Robredo, Senator Leila De Lima and  former Senator and VP candidate Ferdinand “BongBong” Marcos agreed to set aside their differences after unconfirmed reports indicated that former U.S. Ambassador to the Philippines Philip Goldberg authored a blueprint aimed at destabilizing and discrediting the Duterte administration. Political observers are calling it a case of “blood is thicker than water.”

As part of the unity accord, all investigations on the alleged extrajudicial killings under Duterte’s war on drugs will be stopped;  all charges filed against De Lima will be dropped; VP Robredo has agreed to a gag order;  and Marcos, though reluctantly, will withdraw his electoral protest case for the vice presidency.

Is the Philippines on its way to being the Lion King of Asia?