Category Archives: Religion

PHILIPPINES: GETTING MARRIED, BAPTIZED OR BURYING SOMEONE? MUST FIRST PLANT A TREE

imageILOILO, Philippines – Catholics who want to marry, have someone buried or baptized will soon be required to plant trees, according to a Memorandum of Agreement among the Catholic Church, the local government and the Department of Environmental and Natural Resources in the province of Iloilo  in Central Philippines.

Not just any kind of trees, but Bonsai trees.

‘Bonsai’ is a Japanese art form using miniature trees grown in containers. Similar practices exist in other cultures, including the Chinese tradition of penjing from which the art originated.

The agreement, signed on April 22 (Earth Day),  was originally aimed to reforest the lands denuded by Typhoon Yolanda (Haiyan) in 2013.  Thousands of trees, including century-old ones, were uprooted when Typhoon Yolanda hit the province.

However, many Catholics in the province — mostly from low-income families — complained that they do not own any land and would not be able to comply with the tree planting requirement.

As a compromise, the archbishop of Iloilo relaxed the requirement by allowing Catholics to instead plant Bonsai trees on pots and containers inside their homes or apartments.

Taking advantage of the new rule, SM Department Stores in the province quickly added Bonsai trees to their list of available items in their gift registries.

Couples getting married or parents having their children baptized in the Catholic Church can now request their invited guests to give them the gift of Bonsai.

For Catholic burials, families of the deceased can now add the following line in the obituaries:

‘In lieu of flowers, please consider bringing a Bonsai tree to the wake or funeral.’

TELEVANGELIST PAT ROBERTSON WARNS AGAINST YOGA, ZUMBA

VIRGINIA BEACH, Virginia (The Adobo Chronicles) – Televangelist Pat Robertson today warned Christians against practicing or participating in Yoga and Zumba, saying that these popular fitness activities promote the worship of Hindu and Arabic ‘deities.’

Responding to a viewer question on the TV show ‘The 700 Club’ whether she should allow her daughter to continue practicing Yoga, Robertson said that while there is nothing wrong with stretching or exercising, Yoga participants are unknowingly praying to Hindu deities, when they utter what may seem to many as gibberish (Uhmmmm; Kali, Kali, Kali).

After the show aired, Robertson was questioned by Christian reporters on what he thought about another popular fitness activity, Zumba.  Robertson said, “Just like Yoga, Zumba promotes non-Christian deity worship. People might think they are just dancing to some Latin music, but they are actually dancing to appease some Arabic deity.”

(The Adobo Chronicles thinks Robertson mistook ‘Arabic’ for ‘Aerobic’)

So, Christian fitness enthusiasts should stick to ‘jumping jacks.’ Unless Robertson also thinks it is a form of worship for some other deity, like Jack in the Box.

CATHOLIC BISHOPS TO FILIPINO VOTERS: ‘CHOOSE HEAVEN OR HELL’

Villegas (Photo source: www.ucanews.com)
Villegas (Photo source: http://www.ucanews.com)

MANILA, Philippines (The Adobo Chronicles) –  The Philippines can be heaven- or hell-bound, depending on how Filipinos cast their votes in the 2016 presidential elections.

Catholic Bishops’ Conference of the Philippines (CBCP) president Archbishop Socrates Villegas made this statement as he urged Filipino voters to make prayer and discernment the prerequisites in choosing their candidates.

“Make your vote a product of your prayer and discernment…Remember, your vote can bring heaven to the Philippines. Your vote can also bring hell to the Philippines,” Villegas said in a video presentation during Thursday’s launch of “One Good Vote,” the voter education campaign of the Parish Pastoral Council for Responsible Voting (PPCRV).

Asked by reporters what he meant by the choice of heaven or hell, The archbishop said: ‘Very simple. Filipinos can vote for Vice President Jejomar Binay, or Senator Grace Poe.’

Anwering a follow-up question from The Adobo Chronicles about the possibility of Department of Interior and Local Governments Secretary Mar Roxas running for president in 2016, Villegas said, ‘That would be Purgatory.’