Category Archives: Race Relations

Diversity, Immigration, Race Relations, Social Media

Make America Colorful Again!

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Imagine this.

In a bold move to “Make America Empty Again,” Trump’s immigration task force successfully deported everyone who wasn’t white. Factories ground to a halt, Silicon Valley engineers vanished, and suddenly, no one knew how to cook their own food. Wealthy elites found themselves scrubbing their own toilets, hedge fund managers attempted to pick strawberries (and lasted 20 minutes before fainting), and Karen’s favorite Thai restaurant? Closed—because, surprise, Chad doesn’t know how to make Pad Thai.

Wall Street collapsed, Uber rides disappeared, and hospitals operated at half capacity as doctors and nurses were shipped off. Even Mar-a-Lago shut down—turns out, no one wanted to work minimum wage to fold Trump’s golden bedsheets. Meanwhile, Americans sat in their overpriced homes, wondering how their “self-sufficient” nation fell apart in two weeks.

And so, in a shocking twist, Trump made an emergency call: “Come back! I was just kidding!” But the world had moved on.

International, Race Relations, Social Media

Gulf Of America: Donald Trump’s Parenthetical, Half-Victory

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In a bold, unprecedented move, former President Donald Trump issued an executive order renaming the Gulf of Mexico to the “Gulf of America,” proving once again that if you don’t like reality, you can simply rebrand it. The decision was met with a mix of confusion, laughter, and a collective eye-roll from geographers worldwide.

Unfortunately for Trump, Google Maps, the true arbiter of geographical legitimacy, merely added “Gulf of America” in parentheses next to “Gulf of Mexico,” making it the cartographic equivalent of a pity mention. This half-victory is reminiscent of Trump’s infamous Sharpie-altered hurricane map—where his marker, not meteorology, dictated the storm’s path.

Mexico, meanwhile, had no official response, possibly because they were too busy enjoying the fact that the gulf is, geographically, still theirs. Meanwhile, Florida residents continue calling it “the ocean,” proving that no executive order can override sheer indifference.

Language, Politics, Race Relations, Social Media

Senator Bato Dela Rosa On Committing Suicide

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Senator Bato dela Rosa has once again made waves—literally—by declaring that he is willing to kill himself in the West Philippine Sea to prove he is not “pro-China.”

Now, hold on. Why does he need to take a deep dive into self-destruction when he can just prove his patriotism on solid ground? Unless, of course, what he meant was that he’s willing to get killed defending Philippine territory. Big difference.

This is a classic case of how grammar can be a matter of life and death. One minute, you’re a brave patriot; the next, you’re a confused kamikaze. If Bato isn’t careful, he might just end up as the first senator to drown in a misunderstanding.

Moral of the story? Choose your words wisely, or you might find yourself explaining to St. Peter why you voluntarily jumped into contested waters instead of simply holding your ground.