Category Archives: Language

A Message For Mocha Uson From The Deaf Community — In Sign Language

MANILA, Philippines (The Adobo Chronicles, Manila Bureau). Here’s a message on behalf of the deaf community in the Philippines, addressed to PCOO Assistant Secretary Mocha Uson — in sign language.

They’re asking Uson to resign now!

(video courtesy of the Philippine Federation of the Deaf)




Malacañang Now Hiring For Duterte Speechwriters

C01DE1B3-D5AF-4A2B-A00C-00BD5BAE334FMANILA, Philippines (The Adobo Chronicles, Manila Bureau) – Malacañang has just announced  several openings for Presidential speechwriters.

Interested parties should contact Presidential Spokesperson Harry Roque immediately.

Here are the desired qualifications:

  • Must be drug-free (except for over-the-counter medications)
  • College degree not required (Alumni of Ateneo, De La Salle, U.P. and St. Scholastica’s College need not apply)
  • Must be tri-lingual (English, Tagalog and Visayan). Working knowledge of swardspeak a plus.
  • Must be comfortable using foul language
  • Must have the energy to write three-hour-long speeches
  • Crticial Thinking is critical
  • Must have a large caché of jokes
  • Must be well-versed in double entendre
  • Must be a lover of women (gay men also welcome to apply since they love dressing up women and doing their hair and make-up)
  • Must not be too religious (spiritual is okay) and willing to take on the Catholic Bishops of the Philippines
  • Must have an I.Q. 25% higher than Leni Robredo and Cynthia Patag