MANILA, Philippines (The Adobo Chronicles, Manila Bureau) – The most challenging of President Rodrigo Duterte’s Cabinet picks is that of Spokesperson. With his penchant for the sarcastic, extemporaneous, double-meaning and the cryptic, not one person — not even the best and brightest communicator — can seem to fill in for this position.

In the years of the Duterte Administration, there has always been confusion on what the President says or does not say, and how the people close to him have tried to interpret his musings.  Andanar. Medialdea, Panelo, Cayetano, Roque.  Hey, even Uson.

So what does it take to be Duterte’s spokesperson — and Press Secretary, now that he is about to replace PCOO with OPS (Office of the Press Secretary) ?

For starters, he needs someone who knows him from head to foot, literally and figuratively.  He needs someone who has his 100% trust. Someone who has his ear, or both ears.  Someone who knows what he is thinking.  Someone who knows the meaning of what he says.  Someone who knows when he is serious and when he’s bluffing.  Someone who is with him almost 100% of the time. Someone who has access to all his personal and officials functions.

It doesn’t matter if he is a good speaker.  As long as he speaks the truth… or is an expert in covering up the truth just to make Duterte’s critics go nuts.  What the Spokesperson says doesn’t always have to be true.  It just needs to be consistent.

We can only think of one person who fits the bill.  Bong Go.

(The opinion expressed in this piece represents exactly that — an opinion)