MANILA, Philippines — May 27, 2025 — In what may be the most airtight forensic analysis since “nasaan ang Pangulo?”, Senator Ronald “Bato” dela Rosa has come forward to confirm the authenticity of former Presidential Spokesperson Harry Roque’s alleged second passport.

Roque recently took to social media to post a dramatic flat-lay of his cancelled Philippine passport, seemingly in response to swirling rumors that he holds multiple valid passports. The photo, taken under soft lighting and beside a cup of barako coffee, showed a passport with a clear perforation—standard in invalidated documents.

“Authentic ‘yan kasi may butas!” Senator Bato declared in an exclusive interview with The Adobo Chronicles, pausing dramatically before adding, “Eh di ba lahat ng totoo, may butas din?”

Pressed on whether the presence of a hole necessarily proves the passport’s authenticity and not, say, a hole punch from National Bookstore, Bato replied, “Ang sindikato ba marunong magbutas? I don’t think so.”

Political analysts are baffled but entertained. “This could be a new legal standard in the Philippines,” said Atty. Marupok Salvador. “We’re moving from ‘innocent until proven guilty’ to ‘authentic basta may butas.’”

Meanwhile, Roque has yet to clarify whether he was flexing his expired passport in defense, distraction, or simply nostalgia. “This was the passport I used in The Hague,” he posted, as netizens speculated whether the “second passport” was hidden behind the first in the photo like a Russian nesting doll.

As of press time, DFA has neither confirmed nor denied the existence of a second, third, or fourth Roque passport. However, an anonymous source hinted that the agency is now considering a new watermark for authentic documents: Senator Bato’s thumbs-up.

Stay tuned as The Adobo Chronicles investigates whether multiple passports make you a citizen or just really bad at renewing on time.