Category Archives: Health & Medicine

EBOLA DETRACTORS – WHERE ARE THEY NOW?

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San Jose, California (The Adobo Chronicles) – Nevermind the science.

Donald Trump wanted to ban all incoming flights from Africa.  Ann Coulter called the U.S. doctor who treated Ebola patients in West Africa “idotic.”

The states of New York and New Jersey implemented a mandatory quarantine for anyone arriving at their airports  suspected of carrying the Ebola virus. Maine had deployed state police to monitor symptom-less nurse Kaci Hickox when she arrived in the state after spending time in a quarantine tent in New Jersey.

Republicans in Senate battleground races including Kansas, North Carolina and Colorado have called for travel restrictions against countries where the Ebola virus has spread in West African countries.

Network and cable news channels had no shortage of Ebola segments, even dissecting the hazmat suit to prove fluids can still leak through and spread the virus.

By golly, the President of the United States even appointed an Ebola Czar: an attorney!

Americans cowered in fear. Armageddon was coming!

So, why is there an eerie silence now?  Where are the Ebola detractors?

Oh, that’s right, they’re all getting ready to count the votes in tomorrow’s mid-term elections.

What about Ebola?

Nah, they all knew it wasn’t a real threat. But it had to be overblown to increase their protégés’ chances of getting elected. Tomorrow.

Yes, tomorrow, get out and VOTE!

 

 

PHILIPPINE ARCHBISHOP: ‘YOGA IS AN INVITATION TO THE DEVIL’

Photo credit: onlineyogaguide.com
Photo credit: yogaonlineguide.com

Manila, Philippines (The Adobo Chronicles) – If you practice yoga or attend yoga classes as part of your health and fitness regimen, listen up. You are inviting the devil into your body, according to a Manila archbishop.

Msgr. Jay Bandojo, who has special permission to perform exorcisms, said in a recent talk that “When you practice yoga, you are told to ‘empty your mind’ while saying [the mantra] ‘om,’ so you can feel relaxed. But when you empty yourself, you’re opening yourself to demonic possession. You have to be careful because demons might take advantage of this empty vessel of your soul and possess it.”

The belief in occult practices, feng shui, lucky charms, amulets, fortune-telling, astrology, horoscope, transcendental meditation and similar practices also allow demons to have a claim over a person, said Bandojo.

In a predominantly Catholic country like the Philippines, this statement from a church official can have a devastating impact on its citizens. It can change lifestyles and bring about massive unemployment.  Think about the yoga instructors, architects, fortune tellers, astrologists and trinket vendors who will lose their jobs.

Asked what alternative fitness activity Catholics can engage in, Bandojo recommended Zumba, the dance fitness craze that has recently taken the country by storm. In fact, the Philippines just broke the Guinness world record for the largest single Zumba class.

“You see, in Zumba, both your mind and body are constantly in motion. Even if the devil tries to take over your person, it will always be shaken out as you go through your dance routine,” Bandojo said.

So, let go of your ‘oms.’ Instead, practice saying ‘Shake it, shake it’ and sign up for a Zumba class near you.

SF GIANTS QUARANTINED FOR 21 DAYS; FRIDAY’S VICTORY PARADE CANCELLED

imageSan Francisco, California (The Adobo Chronicles) – Friday’s victory parade for the World Series champs has been cancelled, San Francisco Mayor Ed Lee announced this morning. The San Francisco Giants beat the Kansas City Royals in Game 7 Wednesday night to clinch its third World Series title in five years.

The announcement came after Lee received a call from from Kansas City Mayor Sly James that the entire San Francisco team has been quarantined for 21 days and barred from flying.

The state of Kansas has declared a new viral outbreak that’s highly contagious, more so than Ebola. The outbreak seemed to have started during Game 6 of the World Series. Tens of thousands of baseball fans, many of whom came in direct contact with the Giants, exhibited severe symptoms of euphoria, nervous breakdown, intoxication, inflammation of the vocal cords and hypertension — all of which were traced back to Game 6. By Game 7, the new contagion tripled, causing the state of Kansas to declare a health emergency. A new symptom — depression — developed overnight but strangely enough, only the Royals fans are exhibiting it.

Upon consultation with the Feds, notably the Centers for Disease Control, Kansas imposed a mandatory 21-day quarantine on all who attended Games 6 and 7 of the Word Series at the Kauffman stadium. Unfortunately, that includes the Giants team.

Mayor Lee asked for calm in San Francisco and promised that the victory parade will be rescheduled immediately after the Giants are released from quarantine.

Madison Bumgarner, who is widely credited for his role in clinching the World Series title for the Giants, tweeted from Kansas: ‘Bummer!’