Business, Health & Medicine, Law Enforcement

FDA SEEKS TO PROMOTE HUNGER

November 8, 2013 Pol Pinoy Leave a comment

Washington, D.C. – Ah, freedom. You choose to smoke, drink, eat what you want, marry who you choose to, practice your religion (or not), be a Democrat or Republican (or Tea Party pooper).

Ah, capitalism. You are lured into changing your smart phones every six months, get hooked on pay-per-view TV, sold clothing that are meant for models half your waist size, supersize your combo meal.

Then there’s big brother, reading your emails, tracking your whereabouts, warning against vitamin supplements but licensing drugs with potential fatal side effects, taxing your every purchase and what meager income you earn.

Now, the Food and Drug Administration is waging the biggest war since we first learned to say “war on terror.” The new war is against trans fat — not against transgender people or fat people — but the artery-clogging substance that FDA says is the major cause of heart attacks.

The Food and Drug Administration on Thursday proposed measures that would all but eliminate artificial trans fats from the U.S. food supply. Under the proposal, the agency would declare that partially hydrogenated oils, the source of trans fats, were no longer “generally recognized as safe,” a legal category that permits the use of salt and caffeine, for example.

That means companies would have to prove scientifically that partially hydrogenated oils are safe to eat, a very high hurdle given that scientific literature overwhelmingly shows the contrary. The Institute of Medicine has concluded that there is no safe level for consumption of artificial trans fats.

A coalition of fast food restaurants, backed by a grassroots organization calling itself “Leave My Food Plate Alone,” immediately lambasted the FDA proposal, saying that it is really a “war to promote hunger.”

A quick scan of various commercially-available food groups and items by The Adobo Chronicles came up with this partial list containing trans fats:

Cookies, crackers, cakes, muffins, pie crusts, pizza dough, hamburger buns, stick margarine, vegetable shortening, pre-mixed cake mixes, pancake mixes, chocolate drink mixes, fried foods, donuts, French fries, chicken nuggets, hard taco shells, chips, candy, packaged or microwave popcorn , frozen dinners, frozen chicken and noodles, refrigerated crescent rolls, Oreo cookies, Wheat Thins, Triscuits, Fig Newtons, Nilla Wafers, cinnamon rolls, apple pie, hotcakes, pancakes, quarter pounder with cheese. The list goes on…

Will the public soon see lots of empty supermarket shelves and freezers? Will some companies actually go out of business? Stay tuned.

Film and TV, Music

LADY GAGA’S “CONCERT IN SPACE,” MILEY CYRUS’ “TWERKING IN THE DEEP BLUE SEA”

November 7, 2013 Pol Pinoy Leave a comment

Lady Gaga's new album is called "Artpop" — Lady Gaga’s new album is called “Artpop”

Los Angeles, California – The competition for the title of “Avant Garde Performer of the Year” is heating up, and the two top contenders remain the same: Lady Gaga and Miley Cyrus. Music fans will recall the performances of the two ladies at the last MTV Video Music Awards where they both stripped to their bikini outfits. Cyrus, with her now infamous “twerking” clearly outclassed Lady Gaga that night. The awards show was billed “MTV’s Porno Music Awards” by The Adobo Chronicles.

Today, Lady Gaga announced an out-of-this-world concert in 2015 — a concert in space. She says she plans to perform aboard the Virgin Galactic, the passenger spaceplane being launched by British billionaire Richard Branson to popularize space tourism. When she officially launches her new album, “Artpop,” this Sunday, she will perform one song on the spaceship during the Zero G Colony high-tech festival in New Mexico.

As expected, Miley Cyrus immediately countered with her own first-of-a-kind concert plan. Cyrus said she is currently training for a spectacular concert at the bottom of the Mariana Trench in the Western Pacific Ocean. The planned 45-minute concert will be beamed worldwide by satellite and will feature Cyrus singing and twerking inside a special submersible. Although this is not the first time that a celebrity will be lowered into the deepest bottom of the ocean (Titanic producer James Cameron did this in March of 2012), it will be the first time that anyone has ever attempted a live concert under water.

Neither performer has indicated the exact schedule of their planned unworldly concerts, but sources close to The Adobo Chronicles said that the concerts could be scheduled on the exact day and time. Neither will be recorded, so watching the concerts other than “live” will not be an option. Which begs the question: which will the fans watch — Lady Gaga in space or Miley Cyrus in the bottom of the Pacific Ocean?

Politics

IN PHILIPPINE CITY, EVEN THE DEAD MUST PAY RENT OR FACE EVICTION FROM THEIR GRAVES

November 5, 2013 Pol Pinoy Leave a comment

Baguio City, Philippines – Established in the 1900’s, Baguio City in Northern Philippines was developed by Americans primarily as a health resort where the American soldiers and civilian employees could find respite from the sweltering lowland heat. Designed by American architect Daniel Burnham, Baguio City was envisioned to have a resident population of no more than 30,000. Today, this summer resort is home to 300,000 people.

Baguio’s overpopulation has caught up with its dead. The Baguio City cemetery has reached more than its capacity, and the city government has a bright idea to make room for the dead and dying. According to a new city policy, graves of Americans and city residents may lose their place in the cemetery if no one visits them in five years.

Victor Padua, public services assistant of the City Environment and Parks Management Office (CEPMO), said his office was asking families to execute an agreement that stipulates that their dead are no more than tenants with rights to stay in the cemetery for five years, renewable only when they pay the five-year tenancy fee of One Hundred Pesos. The agreement is also a waiver that grants the city government the authority to remove their dead. It stipulates that the city cemetery managers “can transfer and/or rebury/re-inter the remains at other locations after the tenancy period if the relative fails to pay the corresponding fees for extension.”

Long-time residents of Baguio, many of whom have an average of 5 or 6 relatives buried in the cemetery, are gathering signatures for a petition to be presented to city hall. The petition demands that the Baguio City Hall be converted into a mausoleum as a way to solve the cemetery’s problem of overcrowding. “In this modern age where almost all city business can be transacted online, city officials and employees don’t need offices to do their job,” the petition says. It is estimated that the conversion will make available anywhere from 10,000 to 20,000 additional graves and vaults for cremated remains.

Mansion House, Presidential Summer Palace Photo Credit: boyetstour.blogspot.com — Mansion House, Presidential Summer Palace
Photo Credit: boyetstour.blogspot.com

The Adobo Chronicles also learned that residents are organizing a special “neighborhood watch” to be stationed at the cemetery to guard the tombs 24 hours a day in order to deter city officials from excavating graves and evicting the dead.

Petition leaders have reached out to President NoyNoy Aquino to intervene in this controversy. They threatened that if Aquino ignores their plea, they will come up with a second petition demanding that the Mansion House, the sprawling official summer residence of the Philippine president in Baguio City, be converted as well into a mausoleum and burial ground.