(AC team member Melchor Vergara contributed to this report)
Ah, Tio Moreno, a.k.a. Alex Destor—the man, the myth, the misplaced priorities. After years of thriving in the Wild West of social media, where facts are optional and credibility is a distant dream, he has finally drawn the line.
His latest grievance? The Marcos administration appointing a mere vlogger as the new Undersecretary of the Presidential Communications Office. Shocking! Unacceptable! But wait—where was this moral outrage when his fellow propagandist, Trixie Cruz-Angeles, a vlogger with a twice-suspended law license, was handed the same office? Must’ve been a long hibernation.
Alas, Moreno’s indignation is tragically misplaced. Claire Castro isn’t just a “vlogger”—she’s a lawyer, podcaster, columnist, and talk show host. Unlike Moreno, she doesn’t treat “narinig ko lang” as journalism. The real nightmare? If he ever lands a PCO position himself. Future press briefings may require viewers to shield their eyes—because who could forget that this man enjoys undressing on social media?
If hypocrisy were a government position, Tio Moreno would be Secretary for Life. But until then, we await his next meltdown over standards he conveniently forgets when they apply to his own circle.
BAGUIO CITY—In a shocking turn of events, Diwata, the self-proclaimed “Pares Overlord,” graced this year’s Panagbenga Festival with his very own float. Yes, you read that right. While the streets bloomed with breathtaking floral arrangements, one thorn stuck out like a sore thumb—and it had a microphone.
Nobody knows exactly how Diwata infiltrated the parade, but theories range from divine intervention to a clerical error. His float, a monstrous tribute to unlimited rice and questionable charisma, rolled through Session Road as spectators whispered, “Bakit siya nandito?” Meanwhile, his loyal fans (both of them) cheered him on.
Dressed in a colorful Cordilleran vest, Diwata waved to the crowd like a B-movie monarch, occasionally belting out unsolicited life advice. Organizers have yet to comment on this floral invasion, but one thing’s clear: in a festival meant to celebrate beauty, we were all forced to witness something… truly unforgettable. Or is it regrettable?
The Adobo Chronicles 
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