Category Archives: Politics

Dancing Their Way To The Senate: Total Fail (videos)

In the Philippines, politics is showbiz with a Senate floor instead of a soundstage. Nowhere is this clearer than with actors-turned-senatorial candidates like Bong Revilla and Phillip Salvador, whose résumés boast more telenovelas than lawmaking competence.

Bong’s infamous “Budots” dance became his political comeback tour—because nothing says “trust me with national policy” like gyrating to techno beats. Phillip Salvador, meanwhile, once played heroes on screen but struggles with the script when real issues arise. It’s as if voters believed that if you can deliver cheesy lines and shake your hips, you can surely fix the economy! Spoiler alert: you can’t.

Legislation isn’t choreographed; you can’t adlib your way through the budget hearing. We’re electing lawmakers, not variety show hosts. So unless the Senate introduces a “Dancing with the Legislators” segment, maybe it’s time we demand more than a killer dance routine from our public servants.

What Happens In Davao Stays In Davao

Partial, unofficial results

In an unprecedented twist of Philippine politics, Rodrigo Duterte has won Davao City’s mayoral race by a landslide—despite being, well, incarcerated in The Hague.

But who says you can’t lead a city from a 5×8 cell in a high-security international facility? With today’s remote work culture, Mayor Duterte is pioneering WFH: Warden From Home.

Plans are underway to relocate Davao City Hall to The Hague, with Zoom meetings held between prison lockdowns and ICC interrogations.

Meanwhile, son Basté, the accidental vice mayor, is reportedly confused whether he’s acting mayor, understudy mayor, or just holding the clipboard while Dad yells orders from Europe.

Dabawenyos remain unfazed. “At least traffic’s still the same,” one commuter shrugged. International human rights lawyers are reportedly filing motions to mute Duterte’s microphone during council sessions. But in true Duterte fashion, he simply responded, “Who needs a mic when you can curse loud enough to reach Mindanao?”