Category Archives: International

A Celebrity-Studded ICC Trial For Rodrigo Duterte!

Filipinos, once again, have turned a serious political spectacle into the country’s favorite pastime: making memes. 

With Rodrigo Duterte facing the ICC, netizens are having a field day imagining world celebrities and scholars issuing statements of support. “Breaking: Taylor Swift includes ‘EJKs Belong With Me’ in her next album,” one tweet reads. Another suggests that Duterte’s legal defense be led by TV lawyers like Annalise Keating and Harvey Specter—because if you’re going to argue before the ICC, might as well do it in style.

But let’s take it a step further! We, too, would like to submit an open petition: replace the ICC’s chief judge with the only person truly fit to handle this circus—Judge Judy. Just picture it: Duterte explaining himself while she cuts him off with her signature glare. “Baloney!” she’d say. The trial would be done in five minutes, and the memes? They’d last forever.

Donald Trump Does An Imelda Marcos! (video)

Donald Trump, in a striking display of historical mimicry, appears to channel a long-forgotten Imelda Marcos spirit—only 50 years too late.

In a move that could only be described as political makeovers meet nostalgia, the former president has decreed that Washington D.C. must be scrubbed of its unsightly blemishes. Graffitied walls are scheduled for a pristine repaint, homeless tents will vanish like last season’s trends, and potholes are slated for a fill job worthy of a high-budget renovation show.

It’s a curious echo of the famed Filipino First Lady who once ordered the repainting of the grassy borders around Manila’s Folk Arts Theater (which was built in 77 days in time for Manila’s hosting of the Miss Universe Pageant) and concealed informal settlements behind decorative fences along Roxas Boulevard.

Instead of embracing progress, Trump’s plan smacks of a desperate, belated attempt to transform the nation’s capital into a stage for international pageantry—ensuring that even world leaders are spared the sight of America’s unruly underbelly without delay.

Sing-Along: Bring Andy And Harry Home, Let Digong Rest

(To the tune of “Bring Him Home”)

[Verse 1]

God on high, hear our plea,

Send a plane, economy!

Bring them back, we need them here,

Their sweet justice, so sincere.

[Verse 2]

Andy B, where did you flee?

Come back home—transparency!

COA waits, no time to waste,

So much funds still left misplaced.

[Verse 3]

Harry Roque, once so bold,

Spinning tales that must be told.

Tried his best, but lost the fight,

Now just shouting left and right.

[Bridge]

Let Digong rest, let him sleep,

No more stress, no more weep.

Let the old man take a break,

No more tokhang, no more hate.

[Verse 4]

Come on home, face the score,

There’s more fun in ‘Pinas for sure!

Fate is kind, the past is gone,

Now let’s move on… let’s move on.