Category Archives: Finance

Environment, Finance, Tourism

A Modest Proposal To Erase The Philippines’ $118 Billion Foreign Debt

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In the fantastical world of Philippine economics, the solution to crippling foreign debt is as simple as selling off natural wonders to the highest bidder. Who needs pristine landscapes when you can trade them for a fleeting moment of financial solvency? 

The world’s billionaires would rush to own a piece of the pie. They don’t even have to build resorts. They just need to add to their resumés their personal noble contribution to protecting the environment and maintaining balance in the eco systems.

But wait, there’s a catch! To make this grand bargain, the sacred text of the 1987 Constitution must be rewritten, allowing foreign tycoons to gobble up Philippine real estate like candy at a carnival. Who cares about sovereignty when there are dollars to be made?

Of course, why stop at just selling Chocolate Hills and Hundred Islands? With the right amendments, the entire archipelago could become a playground for global elites. Let’s roll out the red carpet for the world’s wealthiest, because who needs national identity when you can have cold, hard cash? 

In this twisted narrative, economic salvation comes at the cost of cultural integrity, turning paradise into a commodity for the highest bidder. Welcome to the Philippines: where debts disappear and landscapes vanish in the name of progress.

Finance, Legislation, National News, Social Media

Imee Marcos: Sign Now, Question Later

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(Updating: Imee Marcos says hers was an “electronic signature” on the AKAP insertion.)

In a stunning display of selective amnesia, Senator Imee Marcos feigned incredulity at the existence of the P26.7-billion Ayuda Kita sa Kapos program, conveniently ignoring her own signature adorning the document. It’s a performance worthy of an Oscar for political amnesia. 

One wonders if her pen has a mind of its own, or if signing first and questioning later has become the new modus operandi in political circles. Perhaps she mistook her signature for a decorative flourish, unaware of the multimillion-peso implications it carries. 

This episode underscores the theatricality that often accompanies political inquiries, where ignorance becomes a shield and accountability a distant concept. It’s reminiscent of a magician feigning surprise at the rabbit emerging from the hat, conveniently forgetting that they put it there in the first place. 

In the circus of political theater, it seems the audience is always left holding the bill.

Economy, Finance, Politics

Desperate Doomsday Shouters (DDShits) Face A Bleak New Year

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It seems the Philippines’ critics will have to postpone their New Year’s celebrations as the country clinches the title of one of the world’s fastest-growing economies. 

This unexpected success has left the DDShits (Doomsday Shouters) and administration critics scratching their heads, desperately searching for a new angle to discredit the Marcos administration. 

Perhaps they could redirect their fervor toward the perennial issue of EDSA traffic, where even the most patient commuters feel like they’re part of a never-ending parade. 

Forget economic triumphs; let’s tackle the true crisis—unruly traffic jams. As the nation prepares for prosperity, critics might need to trade in their pessimistic banners for some EDSA traffic cones. After all, nothing unites a country like the shared misery of a standstill commute. Cheers to a gridlocked New Year!