QUEZON CITY, Philippines (The Adobo Chronicles, Quezon City Bureau) – Move over, Mall of America. Here comes the Great Mall of the Philippines, bigger, better, more modern and more environment- friendly!

Hours after the U.P. Office of Student Regent urged Iskolar ng Bayan (government-paid scholars) to walk out of their classes because of the impending landslide presidential victory of Bongbong Marcos, the president-elect’s transition team immediately submitted a unique proposal: to convert the U.P. Diliman campus into the biggest mall in the world. It will be called The Great Mall of the Philippines.

The transition team made the recommendation, saying that empty classrooms and buildings at the country’s national university would be an unnecessary waste of space, resources and funds.

”Converting the entire campus into a mall would generate billions of pesos to help boost the Philippine economy, not to mention the huge government savings from the withdrawal of funds for free tuition afforded to U.P. students.

The transition team has sent out requests for proposals for the design to convert the sprawling campus to a one-of-a-kind shopping complex with lots of parking, lots of trees, and lots of customer patriotic spirit.

What a win-win project that the BBM administration is off to a great start with!

(Darwin Cañete contributed to this report.)