Manila, Philippines – President Barack Obama’s upcoming visit to the Philippines later this month is being described as an effort to seal the friendship between Uncle Sam and Juan dela Cruz. Negotiations are underway to finalize a bilateral agreement that would increase U.S. military presence in what America considers as a strategic stronghold in the Asia-Pacific region. Obama and Philippine President NoyNoy Aquino are expected to sign the agreement while Obama will be in Manila.
Not so fast. Senator Nancy Binay, daughter of incumbent Vice President Jejomar Binay, and sister of Congresswoman Abigail Binay and Makati City Mayor Junjun Binay, has filed a Senate bill calling for the secession of the Philippines from the U.S. The senator says she believes the Philippines will do just fine without the U.S. “After being colonized by Spain for hundreds of years, occupied by Japan during the last world war, and imperialized by the U.S. and Hollywood for decades, it is time we stand on our own two feet,” Binay told reporters at a press conference at The Manila Hotel, just blocks away from the U.S. Embassy.
Obama is faced by secession threats in his own country, with several states wanting to sever their ties from the Union. The latest state to give notice of secession is Wisconsin.
One critic of Binay was quoted as saying, “I think what the senator really meant was a ‘cessation’ of the negotiations on the bilateral agreement.
Manila, Philippines – Philippine Senator Nancy Binay stayed past her usual bedtime so she could be among the first to learn the fate of the Philippines’ lone representative to the Sochi Winter Olympics who was scheduled to skate in the men’s final program last night, Philippine time.
Binay and her excited aides intensely watched, cheered, and screamed as Michael Christian Martinez executed his free skate routine to the music of “Malagueña.” They sighed as Martinez touched the ice with his hands after performing a triple axel. Martinez skated 3rd among the first group of finalists.
When the screen flashed the standings after the sixth skater, it showed Martinez in first place.
Pandemonium filled Binay’s TV room in her plush residence in Makati and champagne flowed endlessly.
Binay then asked her aide to put in a call to Martinez’s cell phone so that she can personally congratulate him on behalf of the Filipino people for winning the Philippines’ first ever gold medal at the Olympics. She got Martinez’s voicemail and left a congratulatory message. “I’m very proud of you Michael,” she said, “and I will make sure you will come home to a huge welcome parade when you return to Manila.”
Martinez, of course was unavailable to answer his cell phone because he was at the Iceberg Skating Pavilion watching the other 18 competitors still to skate. Martinez ended in 19th place when the competition was concluded.
Nancy Binay is from the family of elected politicans that includes the Philippine Vice President, the mayor of Makati, and a Congresswoman.