WASHINGTON, D.C. (The Adobo Chronicles) – There has not been a clear frontrunner in the Republican nomination for president in the coming 2016 elections. Up until now.
Today, the Republican Party annointed their choice for president, saying they have finally found the man who could put up a strong challenge against the Democratic Party’s presumptive nominee Hillary Clinton.
That man is Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu.
The Republican announcement came just minutes after Netanyahu delivered a speech before a joint session of Congress upon the invitation of House Speaker John Boehner. The speech was interrupted by 25 hysterical standing ovations from the Republican legislators, and Tea Partiers.
“Netanyahu embodies everything that the Grand Old Party stands for (which is nothing), and we are very confident that he can effectively lead this nation with the full blessing and cooperation from the Republican-controlled congress,” Boehner said.
Recognizing that only natural-born citizens can run for U.S. president, Boehner said he and his party will immediately call for a constitutional convention to amend the qualifications for candidates for president so that Netanyahu can be the party’s standard bearer in 2016.
Meanwhile, Netanyahu announced that he is withdrawing his troubled candidacy from the upcoming Israeli elections, saying that being president of the most powerful country on earth is much more appealing than being prime minister of Israel.
WASHINGTON, D.C. (The Adobo Chronicles) – The 114th Congress convenes today amid criticism that its members continue to be overwhelmingly male and white.
To be fair, the new Congress has more women and minorities than any other before it. There are now 96 racial minorities and a record 104 women, and for the first time in history, both parties will include both male and female African-American members.
“While it is true that the new Congress is still overwhelmingly male, I disagree that it is overwhelmingly white,” Boehner said. “I am the best proof. I don’t consder myself white. I’m orange,” the embattled speaker added.
Boehner told The Adobo Chronicles that if reelected speaker, he will mandate that all white members of Congress get a dark tan or wear dark makeup, preferrably orange.
WASHINGTON, D.C. (The Adobo Chronicles) – On Tuesday, January 6, the U.S. House of Representatives will formally elect the next speaker. Incumbent John Boehner may not be it.
At least two conservative hard-liners are now offering themselves up as candidates to unseat Boehner.
Rep. Ted Yoho, R-Florida, said this weekend that he won’t support Boehner as speaker when lawmakers vote Tuesday, and offered himself up as an alternative. Rep. Louie Gohmert, R-Texas, did the same thing on Fox News’ “Fox and Friends Sunday.”
A poll conducted by The Adobo Chronicles shows that 60 percent of Republican congressmen are planning not to vote to reelect Boehner. Click on video for Boehner’s reaction to the poll.
Determined to keep his post as the second in line in case the President of the United States dies or is incapacitated, Boehner intensified his reelection campaign by courting the House Democrats. He told reporters that based on his personal conversations with his Democratic colleagues in Congress, he has at least 40 percent support from those in the opposing party. “That means I am assured of being reelected speaker,” he said.