100 MILLIONTH FILIPINO HAS BEEN BORN, LAWSUITS POUR IN

imageManila, Philippines (The Adobo Chronicles) – At 12:35 a.m., July 17, baby Chonalyn (some media outlets spelled it as ‘Jennalyn’) was born at a local hospital in Manila, making her the 100 Millionth Filipino.

But there is a big problem. Ninety nine other babies were born at exactly the same time at other hospitals and homes all over the country, and all parents want to claim the historic, official title for their newly-borns.

As a result, the parents have hired personal attorneys and are suing the Commision on Population (POPCOM) and the Philippine Statistics Authority (PSA) to lay claim to the much-sought after title.

According to one lawsuit, “the title of 100 Millionth Filipino comes not only with honor and prestige, but the promise of popularity and wealth for the child.” Given what’s stake in the official title, the lawsuits may take months or even years to resolve and may eventually find their way to the Supreme Court.

Meanwhile, baby Chonalyn received a prize of 5,000 pesos worth of in-kind goods.  The cost to her parents for the hospital delivery: 30,000 pesos. Had it been through C-section, it would have cost them twice as much.

It’s always more fun in the Philippines!    

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SECOND PROPOSAL TO SPLIT CALIFORNIA INTO SIX STATES HEADS TO THE BALLOT

Draper's idea of 6 Californias
Draper’s idea of 6 Californias

Sacramento, California (The Adobo Chronicles) – Come November 2016, voters will decide not on one but two separate proposals to split California into six states.

The first proposal to qualify for the ballot was that of venture capitalist Tim Draper. His proposal is to split California into: Jefferson, North California, Silicon Valley, Central California, West California and South California.

EQCA's idea of 6 Californias
EQCA’s idea of 6 Californias

A second initiative, proposed by Equality California (EQCA)  just gained enough signatures to qualify for the ballot.  Under this second proposal, California will be split into the Red, Orange, Yellow, Green, Blue and Violet states. When put together on the map, these six states will look like the gay rainbow flag.  Unlike the Draper initiative, EQCA’s proposal splits the state into more equal parts, or close to equal.  “After all, that’s what we’re all about — equity,” said EQCA board president Andreas Meyer.

Under the EQCA proposal, Silicon Valley, considered the wealthiest region of California will be part of the Yellow state.

(For purposes of disclosure, the headquarters of The Adobo Chronicles is located in the Yellow state. Oh, we mean Silicon Valley).

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

TOP TEN THINGS TO EXPECT FROM SONA (STATE OF THE NATION ADDRESS)

imageManila, Philippines (The Adobo Chronicles) – On Monday, July 28, President Aquino will deliver his 5th State of the Nation Address (SONA), the Philippine equivalent of the U.S. State of the Union (SOTU).

Here are the top ten things to expect from this year’s SONA to be delivered at the House of Representatives Building (Batasang Pambansa).

  1. Aquino has officially renamed it ‘State of NoyNoy Address.’
  2. Only senators and congressmen wearing yellow ribbons will be allowed in the assembly hall.
  3. Senators Juan Ponce Enrile, Bong Revilla, Jr, and Jinggoy Estrada will be participating by skype from their jail cells.
  4. Aquino will begin his address by apologizing to Noranians for snubbing their idol Nora Aunor in the naming of National Artists.
  5. In an unprecedented move, Aquino’s showbiz sister, Kris, will be seated at the dais, next to the podium where the president will be speaking from.
  6. All the justices of the Supreme Court will be seated in the back row of the assembly floor as punishment for ruling that Aquino’s Disbursement Acceleration Program (DAP) is unconstitutional.
  7. Vice President Jejomar Binay will be watching via closed ciruit TV in his senate office; Aquino wants to let Filipinos know  that he is sill in charge.
  8. When Aquino talks about the pork barrel scandal, TV networks will show Janet Lim-Napoles via live cam from her jail cell.
  9. Because Aquino has no accomplishments to report, the SONA will only last for 10 minutes, the shortest presidential SONA ever.
  10. Aquino will declare a recess 5 minutes into his speech for a cigarette break.
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