Category Archives: News Satire

In Anticipation Of The Revocation Of Its Media License, Rappler Proposes To Buy Adobo Chronicles

3b2ffaa7-b486-4b72-984f-89787c9df8a7MANILA, Philippines (The Adobo Chronicles, Manila Bureau) – Now that the Court of Appeals has all but denied Rappler’s petition to reconsider the Securities and Exchange Commission’s earlier ruling revoking its media license for violation of the Constitution, CEO Maria Ressa now wants to buy the rights to The Adobo Chronicles.

Adobo Chronicles, while registered in the U.S., is 100% Filipino owned.

”My business venture with Rappler is in survival mode, and the only way to keep my business operating is to invest in a 100% Filipino-owned company,” Ressa said.

”Besides, Adobo Chronicles fits well into what Rappler has been all about in the years of its existence : propagating biased, fake, and  unbelievable news,” she added,

Ressa is offering $10 Million to buy out the Chronicles.

No word yet from the Adobo Chronicles publisher.


Adobo Chronicles’ Statement On The Statement Of The League Of Cities Of The Philippines

8F2A379F-F153-4B00-A149-24A0C889296B(NOTE: Our system of regular font and italics does not apply for this post)

MANILA, Philippines (The Adobo Chronicles, Manila Bureau) – In a statement posted on its Facebook page, the League of Cities of the Philippines (LCP) condemned The Adobo Chronicles for our satirical news story about the League “launching a campaign against the Senatorial bid of former Solicitor General Florin Hilbay.”

The “news story” which most everyone knew — except perhaps the LCP — was satire, was a light-hearted take on Hilbay’s past criticism of Mayor Rodrigo Duterte, and by extension, all city mayors of the country, of not having the training for international politics.

Here is the LCP statement.

And this is our statement:


It looks like it’s not only #Rappler that does not understand what satire is.

We appreciate the time and effort that the League of Cities of the Philippines took to prepare this statement protesting one of our “stories.”

We just wished that the intelligent men and women of the League also spent the time to research the meaning of satire as well as the history of our “news site.”

Disclaimers are all over our site — if only they took the time to first visit our “About” page before firing off with their statement.

Satire is a centuries-old literary art form that is protected under Free Speech. LSP could have easily Googled it.

But more than that, our same “About” page delineates (although we really don’t have to) what is true and what is fictional in our stories.  Everything that the League is protesting about as fictitious in our story is exactly that — as indicated by the use of regular font.  Only parts of our stories that are in italics are factual.

Facebook has no jurisdiction over our website.  It can exercise control over our site’s Facebook page, but we also know that Facebook understands satire and is equally committed to Free Speech.

(And by the way, can you authenticate your published statement since it was merely ‘signed’ as League of Cities of the Philippines, and not by any real, authorized person or representive?)


Adobo Chronicles’ Great Survey On Magic 12 Of Stupid Dilawan


MANILA, Philippines (The Adobo Chronicles, Mania Bureau) – Forget about the Pulse Asia Survey on the 2019 ‘Senatoriables.”  Here comes the survey of the decade.

If we were to come up with the ‘Magic 12’ of the most stupid Dilawan, who would you want included in this prestigious list?

Vote in our poll and let your voice be heard.

(You can vote for as many names as you wish.  You can also add names of those not on our list.)