Category Archives: Legislation

(Senate) Class Dismissed!

In a plot twist worthy of a teleserye, certain senators have magically decided that due process is so passé—especially when it comes to the impeachment trial of Sara Duterte. With the subtlety of a bulldozer in a tiangge, covert moves are underway to dismiss the trial faster than a session adjournment after lunch. Bravo!

But here’s a wild idea: instead of dismissing the trial, why not dismiss the puppeteers behind this constitutional circus? The Filipino people are taking attendance—and guess what? We see you, Senator Spinmaster, and your fellow Defenders of the Dynasty.

If the Senate won’t uphold accountability, perhaps it’s time the people gave you a proper dismissal. Yes, senators, class dismiss! And unlike your backdoor deals, this one comes with no exit pass. Bring snacks next time; democracy’s long, but karma has better timing.

Marcoleta Runs Into ABS-CBN’s Karlo Katigbak

Senator-Elect Marcoleta runs into ABS-CBN President Karlo Katigbak in an elevator at BGC. Here’s their brief conversation:

Rodante Marcoleta: Well, well, if it isn’t the ghost of channel past! Still broadcasting… online, I see.

ABS-CBN President Karlo Katigbak: Senator Marcoleta! I didn’t realize elevators accept people who cancel dreams.

Marcoleta: Oh please. Dreams? You made more telenovelas than tax payments.

Katigbak: We paid taxes! BIR said so! You just preferred teleseryes with government plot twists.

Marcoleta: Fair. But admit it — ratings soared after I entered the scene. I practically gave you a new storyline.

Katigbak: We called it “The Man Who Cancelled Christmas… and Primetime.”

Marcoleta: You have to admire my range. From blocking franchises to starring in public hearings — peak drama!

Katigbak: You should try acting. You’re great at pretending to listen.

Marcoleta: Touché. But look — the country loves second chances. Even “Ang Probinsyano” had nine lives.

Katigbak: So… reconciliation?

Marcoleta: Maybe. But only if I get a cameo role — Senator by day, frequency wrecker by night.

Katigbak: Fine. But no script rewrites during commercial breaks.

*[Elevator dings. They exit together. A new show is born: “Franchise of Our Lives.”]

Congresswoman-Elect Leila De Lima’s Message For All (video)