Category Archives: Law Enforcement

The HOR SMNI Circus

In the grand spectacle of the Congressional hearing on the SMNI franchise, Filipinos could be forgiven for thinking they stumbled upon a surreal circus. 

The resource persons, caught in the crossfire, exemplified a delicate dance between providing information and avoiding detention. It was a lesson in bureaucratic tightrope walking.

The legislators, masters of the elusive art of asking questions they wanted answered with a “yes,” engaged in a dazzling display of verbal acrobatics. A linguistic trapeze act left spectators bewildered, wondering if anyone had truly grasped the nettle of inquiry.

Meanwhile, the SMNI hosts, notorious for their unyielding on-air personas, transformed into docile kittens in the legislative lion’s den. Firm convictions crumbled into wishy-washy ambiguity, as if their microphones had been replaced with feathers.

As the host claimed her televised remark was a question and not an opinion and that she was merely echoing an entity she was once a spokesperson of, the audience couldn’t help but marvel at this linguistic contortionist’s attempt to dislocate responsibility. 

And the hunger strike? Even a fifth-grader could see through the transparent ploy to play victim.

As the circus unfolded, it became clear that in the political big top, everyone’s a clown.

TVJ To TAPE: “Eat Your Heart Out!”

The Intellectual Property Office of the Philippines has crowned Tito Sotto, Vic Sotto, and Joey de Leon as the undisputed kings of midday gastronomic entertainment. The ruling in the “Eat Bulaga” trademark cancellation case is a triumph of wits over, well, lunch.

With the decision in their favor, TVJ can now savor the sweet taste of victory and deliver a hearty “Eat your heart out!” to Television and Production Exponents (TAPE) Inc. It seems the battle for the trademark was more cutthroat than a cooking show, with both parties vying for the right to slap “Eat Bulaga” on their midday feast of television mediocrity.

One can only imagine the highbrow discussions that took place in the Intellectual Property Office, where presumably, the fate of the nation’s intellectual delicacies was decided with the gravity it truly deserves. 

Let the feast of legal jargon and trademark drama continue, for the real winners are, of course, the discerning viewers. Bon appétit, Philippines!

Senator Bato Dela Rosa: Cry, Baby, Cry!

In the grand theater of Philippine politics, Senator Bato de la Rosa has emerged as the undisputed maestro of melodrama, orchestrating tearful symphonies that would make even the most seasoned soap opera stars jealous. 

His recent sob fest, triggered by Senator Risa Hontiveros’ call for an International Criminal Court investigation into Duterte’s war on drugs, was a masterclass in the art of political weeping.

While some may argue that men in uniform should be impervious to the sting of criticism, de la Rosa insists on proving that even the most stoic figures have tear glands hidden beneath their macho façades. 

As the prime implementor of Duterte’s draconian drug policies, Bato seems to have mistaken the Senate for a therapy session, turning each hearing into a tearful confessional.

In this tragicomedy, the nation watches with bated breath as the senator dons the mantle of the Senate’s resident cry baby, proving that even the most privileged lawmakers are not immune to the sweet, salty release of self-pity. 

Perhaps it’s time to introduce waterproof podiums to the Senate floor to spare us from the spectacle of a weeping legislator.