Everyone’s eyes are on Carlos Yulo, but not for his gymnastic prowess alone.

The lad hasn’t even finished his Olympic routines, and he’s already set to rake in P10M from the PH government, P3M from Congress, and a swanky P24M condo from Megaworld.

But wait, there’s more! Tipsy Pig has thrown in a lifetime of free food and drinks – imagine all that crispy pata and sisig! And what about a lifetime of free buffets from Vikings? Oh, my!

Not wanting to be left out of the celebration frenzy, we at The Adobo Chronicles are thrilled to offer Yulo something truly invaluable: a lifetime subscription to our publication, complete with direct text alerts for every new story. Because nothing says Filipino pride like being up-to-date with the latest in satirical news.

After all, while gold medals may glitter, our headlines shine just a bit brighter. Cheers to you, Carlos, and here’s to celebrating in the most “Filipino” way possible!