MANILA, Philippines (The Adobo Chronicles, Manila Bureau) – Martin Andanar, Secretary of the Presidential Communications Office,  today announced to the Filipino people that the second coming of Jesus Christ is here!  And it is in the person of President Rodrigo Roa Duterte.

“We see a different Jesus, a cussing saviour out to free the Filipinos from the ‘gates of hell,’  Andanar said.  “It’s time to repent and follow the new Jesus, as I have.”

In an opinion piece published in the Daily Inquirer, Andanar compared his first meeting with Duterte in Davao City to when Jesus met the fishermen who would be his apostles at Galilee.

Andanar didn’t’ say which apostle he was — Simon Peter, James or John.