WIKILEAKS: GEORGE W. BUSH WANTED TO TRANSFER THE SEAT OF U.S. GOVERNMENT TO IRAQ

gty_white_house_replica_wy_141028_16x9_992Ebril, Iraq (The Adobo Chronicles) – The latest secret document to be published by WikiLeaks, the international online organization that has been uncovering classified information, reveals that President George W. Bush wanted to transfer the seat of the U.S. Government to Ebril in Northern Iraq.

It was purportedly part of the overall plan that began with the U.S. invasion of Iraq disguised as a search for Saddam Hussein’s Weapons of Mass Destruction (WMD).

The document shows that Bush was so confident that he could find WMD to justify his desire to colonize Iraq that he ordered the construction of a White House replica in Ebril.  His plan was to occupy the “other” White House in Ebril for the rest of his presidency. Bush is known to fancy desert weather.

Following the latest leak, ABC News went in search of the  White House replica in Ebril (see photo), and found that it was never fully completed.  It is still undergoing the final touches but it is now owned by a prominent Kurdish businessman.

So the next time you see a photograph of the White House, it may not be the one on 1600 Pennsylvania Ave.

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500 FREE ONE-WAY TICKETS BEING OFFERED ON HAWAIIAN AIRLINES

imageHonolulu, Hawaii (The Adobo Chronicles) – It is rare that commercial airlines offer free tickets with no strings attached. But that is exactly what Hawaiian Airlines is offering – complimentary tickets to as many as 500 passengers. What’s the catch? The tickets are one-way — out of Hawaii.

The offer is part of a new initiative between the Honolulu government and private businesses in Waikiki’s tourism industry.

For several years now, Waikiki has seen a sharp increase in homeless people lining Kalakaua Avenue directly across from Waikiki Beach. Honolulu’s City Hall and Waikiki merchants have agreed that the sight of homeless people — many of whom are from states in the U.S. Mainland — is not good for tourism which is the top revenue-earning industry of Hawaii.

Hawaii Lodging & Tourism Association (HLTA) is giving the Institute for Human Services (IHS) $100,000 this year in addition to the same amount next year. But that’s just to kick start the program. The funds will help pay for the tickets on Hawaiian Airlines.

“When the number one complaint from our visitors on why they will not be coming back to Hawaii is the homeless, you have an issue,” said George Szigeti, President and CEO of HLTA. “So when IHS came to us with a plan of action tailored to address the homeless situation in our Waikiki community, we were pleased and we immediately pledged our support,” Szigeti said.

It is estimated that currently, about 500 individuals  call the streets of Waikiki home. The city would need an additional $400,000 to complete the process of sending the homeless back to their home states. It hopes to raise that amount quickly from businesses in Waikiki.

To qualify for the complimentary tickets, homeless people must appear at City Hall for a mugshot and fingerprinting and sign a pledge never to return again to the Aloha State. If they prefer to fly first class, they have to personally shoulder the price difference.

Say ‘Aloha!’

SF GIANTS QUARANTINED FOR 21 DAYS; FRIDAY’S VICTORY PARADE CANCELLED

imageSan Francisco, California (The Adobo Chronicles) – Friday’s victory parade for the World Series champs has been cancelled, San Francisco Mayor Ed Lee announced this morning. The San Francisco Giants beat the Kansas City Royals in Game 7 Wednesday night to clinch its third World Series title in five years.

The announcement came after Lee received a call from from Kansas City Mayor Sly James that the entire San Francisco team has been quarantined for 21 days and barred from flying.

The state of Kansas has declared a new viral outbreak that’s highly contagious, more so than Ebola. The outbreak seemed to have started during Game 6 of the World Series. Tens of thousands of baseball fans, many of whom came in direct contact with the Giants, exhibited severe symptoms of euphoria, nervous breakdown, intoxication, inflammation of the vocal cords and hypertension — all of which were traced back to Game 6. By Game 7, the new contagion tripled, causing the state of Kansas to declare a health emergency. A new symptom — depression — developed overnight but strangely enough, only the Royals fans are exhibiting it.

Upon consultation with the Feds, notably the Centers for Disease Control, Kansas imposed a mandatory 21-day quarantine on all who attended Games 6 and 7 of the Word Series at the Kauffman stadium. Unfortunately, that includes the Giants team.

Mayor Lee asked for calm in San Francisco and promised that the victory parade will be rescheduled immediately after the Giants are released from quarantine.

Madison Bumgarner, who is widely credited for his role in clinching the World Series title for the Giants, tweeted from Kansas: ‘Bummer!’

IN LIEU OF NATIONAL ANTHEM, LORDE TO SING ‘ROYALS’ AT FINAL WORLD SERIES GAME

imageKansas City, Kansas (The Adobo Chronicles) – It all comes down to this. Game 7, the final match between the San Francisco Giants and the Kansas City Royals, happens tonight. Who will win this year’s World Series?

But first, who will sing the national anthem? Aaron Lewis’ botched rendition of the Star-spangled banner in Game 5 didn’t bode well for the Giants.  It just added insult to injury when considering San Francisco radio stations’ decision to ban Lorde’ s Grammy-award winning song ‘Royals’ from the airwaves for the duration of the World Series.

Now, Kasas City has the last word: it has invited Lorde to sing her hit song ‘Royals’ — in lieu of the national anthem.

Perhaps it is not a wise political move, but the Royals think it is a brilliant psychological strategy to damage the morale of the Giants and their fans going into Game 7.

Who are you going to root for? Lorde or the Giants?

And who will win the World Series title?

It all happens tonight at 5:07 pm Pacific Daylight Saving Time.

JOLLIBEE TOPS LIST OF CHAIN RESTAURANTS AMERICANS HAVE NEVER HEARD OF

jollibee-4Oak Brook, Illinois (The Adobo Chronicles) – A good number of Americans are quite familiar with adobo, lumpia and pancit, but most have not heard of Jollibee.  Is it a bird? Is it an insect? Is it a clown?

The answer is: none of the above. It is the fast food chain restaurant that continues to be the greatest threat to McDonald’s in the Philippines, and who knows, perhaps even in the international fast food market. Its menu includes favorites like chicken joy, (sweet) spaghetti, and burgers cooked Filipino-style. It also serves traditional Pinoy breakfasts like tapsilog, longsilog, and bangsilog.

A recent survey conducted by thrillist.com put Jollibee in the number one spot among international chain restaurants that Americans haven’t seen or heard of before. It ranked the best among food chains that originated in countries like Russia, Singapore, Germany, France, the U.K., Brazil and Japan.

CaptureUpon hearing of the survey, top executives at the McDonald’s headquarters in Illinois convened an emergency meeting to strategize on how to counter what they expect to be a sudden surge in the popularity of Jollibee in the U.S.

“We’ve pretty much given up trying to beat that fat, stupid, happy bee in the Philippines, but for it to threaten our business here in America is just not acceptable,” a spokesperson for McDonald’s said.

Gird up your loins. Jollibee may soon be coming to a mall or street corner near you.

 

 

MONDAY, OCTOBER 31 DECLARED A HOLIDAY IN THE PHILIPPINES

imageManila, Philippines (The Adobo Chronicles) – Filipinos woke up this morning to the exciting news that President NoyNoy Aquino has signed an executive order declaring Monday, October 31 a special non-working holiday.

The news was carried by The Inquirer, the country’s leading daily newspaper.

The executive order was signed by Aquino’s Executive Secretary Pacquito Ochoa, Jr., who said that the President wanted to give Filipinos an extra day off to honor their dearly departed.  November 1, All Saints’ Day, is when Filipinos troop to cemeteries to pay respect to the dead.

But wait, isn’t October 31 a Friday?

Indeed it is. Apparently, The Inquirer mistakenly printed a news story from its 2011 issue.  October 31, 2011, was a Monday.

Aquino felt so bad about the newspaper’s goof that he went ahead and declared Monday, November 3 a special non-working holiday.

Have a great long weekend!

SAN FRANCISCO’S GAY DISTRICT 8 ELECTIONS IS ONE TO WATCH

imageSan Francisco, California (The Adobo Chronicles) – The electoral contest for San Francisco’s District 8 county supervisor slut, err slot,  is pretty much decided in favor of incumbent Scott Wiener. Well, until today, when a write-in campaign was launched by Latina lesbian comedian Marga Gomez.

The campaign is  going viral and is gaining widespread support from the LGBT community which is not happy about Wiener’s policies and initiatives which many consider to be more pro-business than pro-LGBT.

Supporters of Gomez will hold a vigil rally from 6 to 9 pm on October 30 in front of Hechos restaurant on Market Street  while Wiener and Mayor Ed Lee host a party celebration on Castro and 18th Streets following a ribbon cutting ceremony to mark the completion of the Castro Street Improvement Project.

Never has a write-in candidate won an election, but Gomez could make  this a Guinness World Record, and it will be a feather in the cap of the LGBT community.

Go vote on November 4.

 

 

 

 

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