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At a modest Maisug Rally in Hong Kong, the illustrious blogger Tio Moreno proudly extolled the unprecedented achievements of his employer, Vice President Sara Duterte, leaving the small crowd in awe.

He enthusiastically declared her as the VP who did many firsts in the office she holds. Let us count the ways.

First to secure confidential funds for her office, a feat surely unmatched in transparency.

She has masterfully institutionalized the “no comment” response, an innovation in avoiding accountability.

Her unique bond with a presidential sister, who intriguingly criticizes her own president brother, adds a familial twist to political dynamics.

Sara’s flair for humor shines in her video mocking her own neck injury, a first in political self-parody.

And who could forget her imaginative fake news about her father and brothers’ senatorial ambitions?

One can’t help but wonder what other groundbreaking “firsts” she might achieve in the next four years. Could she set a new precedent by resigning before her term ends? Stay tuned!