In a stunning display of political theatrics, Sara Duterte, the master of the political puppetry, has declared that she won’t be running for president in 2028. It’s a statement so believable that even unicorns are considering a career in accounting. As critics scramble to decipher the true meaning of her words, it’s reminiscent of a Shakespearean comedy where everyone misunderstands everyone else.

The alleged impeachment plans against Duterte have all the subtlety of a bull in a China shop. It’s like trying to catch smoke with a butterfly net — an exercise in futility. The sudden uproar over confidential funds is as convincing as a magic trick at a children’s birthday party. Abracadabra, look over here while the real trick is happening behind the scenes!

Even a fifth-grader can see through the smoke and mirrors; it’s a classic diversion tactic. While her opponents strategize, Duterte probably has a countdown clock to 2028 hidden somewhere, chuckling at the chaos she’s orchestrated. As for her statement, seasoned politicians know it’s just a draft waiting for the appropriate time to be revised. So, as the opposition contemplates its next move, we’ll just grab the popcorn and wait for the next act of this political circus. The drawing board might need a vacation after this.

So, the DDS’ and the Paid Parrot Propagandists’ grand saga of illogical obsessions continue to unfold! 🎭

In the latest plot twist, Sara Duterte graciously declares she won’t run for president in 2028, and this shattered the glass delusions of Duterte devotees who have been penning operas of absurdity. 🤷‍♀️🗳️

But let’s not underestimate the mental gymnastics of these rabid supporters. They relentlessly clamor for the vice president to run against her own will! And it’s only 2023! 🤸‍♂️💫

What motivates them, you ask? Perhaps it’s the PPP’s puppet masters who have interests to protect and the ones pulling strings in the shadows, or it is a mere desire to tarnish the Marcos administration. Who knows? 🕵️‍♂️💭

Now, enter Pres. Bongbong Marcos, defending Sara Duterte like a knight in shining political armor. He termed their camaraderie “excellent,” and he even went the extra mile to shower praise on the VP. 🛡️👏 What does this reveal?

It reveals the real destabilizers, my precious readers, are not Speaker Martin, not the Loyalists, not the PCO, not the BBM bloggers/vloggers, not the Makabayan Bloc, but the DDS, who are purveyors of fake news and champions of conspiracy theories, a genre they’ve mastered without rhyme or reason. 📰🕵️‍♀️

In a dazzling display of cognitive dissonance, despite the recent declarations from Sara and BBM, the DDS clings to their conspiracy theories like a shipwreck survivor to a piece of driftwood. Because, you see, in the DDS Universe, the President and the Speaker must be orchestrating elaborate demolition campaigns against Sara Duterte. Seriously, who needs facts when you can have fantastical fiction? 📚🤯

So, brace yourselves for the next act in this theatrical production of political buffoonery. The DDS may lack the capacity to think, but their ability to weave tales of intrigue and confusion is truly unmatched. 🎭🤔