In a bold leap toward Vatican cosplay, the Philippine Senate has decided to spice up the impeachment trial of VP Sara Duterte by going full papal conclave. 

Senate President Chiz Escudero, clearly inspired by either divine intervention or a Netflix binge, has reportedly approved a plan to lock senators in a room until they produce a verdict—or at least enough drama for a teleserye. No media coverage, no leaks—just pure, old-fashioned suspense. 

To announce the decision, a chimney (probably borrowed from an old Max’s Fried Chicken branch) will puff out white smoke if Duterte is convicted or acquitted. A loud speaker will blast the words “habemus iudicium” (we have a verdict).

The votes will be anonymous and confidential so no one will know how individual senators voted.

Until then, Filipinos will keep an eye on the Senate roof, praying the smoke isn’t just someone burning budget records. Democracy never looked so lit—literally.