In a masterstroke of PR wizardry, President Bongbong Marcos has preemptively tackled the anticipated “damning polvoron video” promised by Vlogger Maharlika and others.

Instead of waiting for the seemingly mythical footage to surface, Marcos decided to break the internet with a photo of himself using coke — a t-shirt of the cola that is.

The message was clear: why wait forever for a phantom scandal when you can quench your critics’ thirst with a refreshing dose of humor? In true Marcos fashion, he turned potential scandal into a marketing coup, showcasing his ability to stay cool under pressure—literally. The president’s move was hailed as a stroke of genius, proving once again that the best way to disarm detractors is with a smile and a cold beverage.

As netizens debated the implications of Maharlika’s elusive exposé, Marcos enjoyed a fizzy victory, leaving everyone to wonder if the polvoron was ever real or just a crumb of conspiracy.