ABS-CBN: Plotting The History Of KathNiel

In an impressive display of journalistic prowess, ABS-CBN has embarked on a Herculean mission to document the groundbreaking 11-year history of KathNiel, the dynamic duo that has captured the hearts of millions. 

Forget the intricacies of NCAA March Madness bracketing; ABS-CBN has boldly chosen to channel their inner artistic genius using a flip chart paper and a trusty black marker. Who needs high-tech graphics and expert analysis when you can have the charm of hand-drawn timelines?

While basketball enthusiasts engage in the cerebral exercise of predicting national champions, ABS-CBN’s budget-friendly approach is a beacon of fiscal responsibility. In an era of digital innovation, the network has embraced the simplicity of a bygone era, proving that sometimes all you need is a flip chart and a dream. 

Move over, high-tech documentaries; ABS-CBN’s flip chart saga is the new gold standard in storytelling, leaving audiences wondering, “Why complicate things when you can just flip and draw?”

OPINION: SMNI: Truth That Hurts ?

The move to cancel SMNI’s franchise is a brilliant display of bureaucratic irony, akin to declaring a cat an aspiring dog. The debate over its “news media” status is as comical as questioning whether a rubber chicken qualifies as a gourmet chef. 

SMNI, often perceived as a dutiful corps of cadets, seems more dedicated to its founder than delivering credible news to the Filipino audience. Pondering their loyalty is like wondering if a puppet is loyal to the puppeteer. The news readers, a choir of devoted acolytes, harmonize hymns of praise for their pastor-owner, leaving little room for objective journalism.

An “audit” of their anchors might reveal a surprising lack of journalistic backgrounds, reminiscent of hiring lifeguards who’ve never seen water. One astute netizen rightly labeled SMNI as “an association of trolls and bloggers,” a revelation as shocking as finding out clowns are entertainers. 

The revocation of its franchise is not a cancellation but a correction—a necessary adjustment for an oxymoron masquerading as news. 

Yet, in this circus of media outfits, where the least-trusted brand (read: Rappler) is a dubious honor, perhaps SMNI’s franchise cancellation is just a sideshow in the grand spectacle of misinformation.