Ah, the age-old practice of selling votes in beauty pageants, where the criteria for beauty and talent are as concrete as a cloud on a windy day. It’s a dazzling spectacle of capitalism in action, where the highest bidder can transform an under-qualified candidate into a semi-finalist overnight. Who cares about poise, intelligence, or talent when you can just slap some cash on the table?

It’s a brilliant system, really. Why bother with tedious things like fairness and merit when you can simply auction your way to the top? The criteria established for beauty pageants? Mere decoration, my dear! After all, what’s the point of having standards when you can just buy your way around them? It’s a shining example of how the pursuit of superficial beauty can be reduced to a crass, cash-fueled competition.

So let’s not be surprised when the next beauty queen is chosen by the highest bidder rather than by her actual qualifications. After all, in the world of pageants, it’s not about the contestants; it’s about who’s willing to open their wallet the widest.