Sen. Manny Pacquiao Proposes Compensation For Filipinos Who Have Not Received Their National IDs

Senator Manny Pacquiao has stepped into the bureaucratic boxing ring by proposing a bill that promises financial consolation for Filipinos still waiting for their national IDs. 

The proposed legislation dictates that the Philippine Statistics Authority (PSA) must pay citizens a whopping P1 per day of delay in ID delivery. Notably, this excludes the flimsy paper-generated printouts the PSA suggested recipients laminate themselves.

Pacquiao’s brainchild, aptly named the “ID Compensation Act,” aims to make procrastination profitable. The date of reckoning for this ingenious scheme is the day applicants signed and submitted their forms. 

With the National ID Program kicking off in 2019, those who applied that year are now on the verge of receiving a windfall, racking up almost P1,000 in compensation and counting. 

While critics argue it’s a jab at common sense, proponents commend Pacquiao for turning bureaucratic backlog into a financial jackpot.

U.S. State Department Responds To Sass Rogando Sasot On Facebook Account Deletion

Who are you, indeed, to think that the U.S. State Department, the supposed puppet master of global chaos, would bother orchestrating the takedown of a Netherlands-based Filipino blogger’s Facebook page?

We may have our hands full with international diplomacy, but plotting the demise of a blogger nestled comfortably in tulip fields is a bit too niche for our taste. Sass Rogando Sasot’s imagination seems to have taken a scenic detour through conspiracy-land, where every internet glitch is a government plot.

Rest assured, our elite team of meme enthusiasts and social media influencers are far too busy crafting tasteful diplomatic tweets to bother with silencing a blogger. We kindly suggest that Sasot redirect her investigative prowess towards more pressing matters, like finding out who stole the office snacks or deciphering the mysteries of the Bermuda Triangle. 

Meanwhile, we’ll be here, sipping our coffee and contemplating the geopolitical implications of cat videos.

Dateline Zürich: The Case About Rumours

By Maria Bratikova

Rumours and Gossip are an incestuous relationship. There is, however, a minuscule difference, so minute that it can be called same difference. 

For example:

Every loose-tongued creature intentionally spreads a story that is not true, that is mendacious, perfidious and malicious. The rumour-monger‘s fundamental purpose is to destroy a person‘s reputation, an issue, anything that doesn‘t fit his or her preconceptions, hopes and biases. The rumour mill does not care about truth; it‘s only care is to spread lies, myths, fabrications, fake news.

For example, as an example to the preceding example:

Since over 7 years ago, a bird told me that President Marcos snorts pulvoron, baby powder, angel dust, coke, pepsi and kool-aid. That he came back od’d from Spain one time, that Imee went to beg Duterte (the President at that time) to please keep that info at Fort Knox hermetically sealed. Hmmm, but the one telling me this knew it, Baby! The loose-tongue biaaaatch knew it. Dang it, I was floored! The venomous-cretin does not care about it being the process of idiotic longings and overkill imaginations of stymied personal hubris and longings, does not care about providing evidence cos there‘s not one. Just smuggle innuendos here, blind items here, a shy little mention there. In other words null, nada, zero, zilch. Spread it anyway –  just do it!  Sow doubt, create division – never mind the  internecine effects on both sides of the divide created by such nonsense. Divide and roll. 

Rumour-mongers know there is not a scintilla of truth nor evidence in the fiction they present as truth. The sense is totally and intentionally kept under wraps, disregarded. A scum floated by another scum in wholesale. The idea is to assassinate character or a character. The little difference, when juxtaposed to gossip, is that the gossip (can stand by itself as a noun and usable as the subject of the noun which may also be a noun!) or the gossip monger may have a fibre of truth in the gossip being viralled by word of mouth, blab about another to another – marites, as you call it these days. Bla-bla-bla. The other one is a pseudo-documentary.

Beware to weigh the blabber you hear and read fromcreatures which can be from one you admire, consider as awesome, a pet-peeve, a wanna-be, a die-hard turncoat or just a total big big ars*loch. . . (Oops,that should be a capital Ars*E*0le).

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