RJ Nieto, a.k.a. Thinking Pinoy is now a math student in London.

Jover Laurio, a.k.a. Pinoy Ako Blog is now a travel agent.

Mocha Uson, now blogs about food and pets.

I.R.E. Sass Rogando Sasot has turned intrigera and tsismosa expert.

Journalist Krizette Laureta Chu is now a LIAR, according to Rep Jude Acidre.

Broadcaster Jay Sonza is the new Kristy Fermin. Or is it Lolit Solis?

Mark Lopez is still Mark Lopez, the Kuryente King.

Smartmatic Whistleblower Atty. Glenn Chong is now whistling about Bb. Maharlika.

Bb. Maharika is…. Maharlika who?

In the latest episode of “Duterte’s Drug Chronicles,” our esteemed former leader Rodrigo Duterte claims that President Bongbong Marcos once graced the PDEA’s naughty list for alleged drug use. With all the credibility of a soap opera plot twist, Duterte proudly admits he can’t locate the elusive list, leaving us to wonder if it’s stored next to his secret stash of dragon eggs. Perhaps the list is hiding in the same undisclosed location as his promised jet ski ride to the South China Sea.

Duterte’s performance is nothing short of a comedic masterpiece, a farcical dance between memory lapses and wild accusations. It seems his fentanyl-fueled imagination is working overtime, weaving tales of rehab stints in Germany that rival the most imaginative fiction.

In this carnival of absurdity, Duterte’s assertions demand the suspension of disbelief. We’re left to ponder whether his fentanyl prescription has inadvertently transformed him into the nation’s chief storyteller, crafting narratives more fictional than a Marcos family tree.