Don’t forget that tomorrow starts the new Facebook rule where Mark Zuckerberg can sneak into your kitchen at night and eat whatever is in your refrigerator.

To stop him from doing that, copy and paste this message on your Facebook feed:

“I do not authorize Mark Zuckerberg or any entity associated with Facebook to sneak into my house and eat anything in my refrigerator. With this statement, I notify Facebook to leave my milk, eggs, butter, cheese, veggies, sandwich meats, pickles, and leftover pizza alone.”

After you copy and paste this message, the light in your refrigerator will turn blue 🔵 and you’re good to go.

by Maria Bratikova

Here‘s a photo of a creature on a drip. Easy to make a caption:

Binugbog daw ni misis
Na-od sa baby powder
The prayer for his passing is taking effect
The dawn is coming
We don‘t need his ouster noe that he‘s sick
Rambulan sa Palasyo
Trangkaso yan
Flu-like Symptoms: A sign of drug abuse
The pulvoron effect
Lisa goes haywire
Let Sara lead
Who is running the government now that he is od‘d?
Pray for Quiboloyo
The country is reeling, he is not leading
The President Should unite the V/Bloggers
The Budol and the airport rat
Sara and Karma on BBM
Bruxism is also called cocaine jaw

Look, ma. . . who is that?

Si Bonget yarn!

Wow, it feels like a whole era has passed since I last checked in on the political scene! Well, now, let’s dive into the latest world of Philippine politics, where the currency 💰 is not just mere words, but how passionately one can defend the indefensible. 😂🙄

Here’s something to think of: If Jay Sonza is pocketing a cool ₱1 million a month from SMNI/Pastor Quiboloy, one can only wonder at the paycheck of the likes of Trixie-Cruz Angeles, Mark Lopez, Banat By and Lorraine Badoy in their fervent crusade to shield the “Appointed Son of God” from the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune – and allegations. 🏹

Picture this: the Gawad Urian Awards — but for the most zealous defenders of The Kingdom. The envelope, please! And the winner for ‘Best Performance in a Leading Role’ goes to… well, the suspense is less about who wins and more about the size of their take-home pay, isn’t it? For why would they risk sounding irrational, illogical, and sometimes outright dumb for nothing? 🤑

In a world where defending someone with a laundry list of allegations against him in the Philippines and America is considered a full-time job, our quad might just be the envy of every spin doctor out there. 🤡

If Jay Sonza’s monthly haul is the benchmark, then Trixie-Cruz Angeles, Mark Lopez, Banat By, and Lorraine Badoy might be negotiating their contracts for that sweet, sweet “Appointed Son of God” defender bonus. Are they getting double? Triple? A percentage of the Holy treasury? 💰👼🔝

But let’s keep it classy, shall we? After all, discussing salaries is a bit gauche – especially when the paychecks are supposedly signed by the Divine ✍️😇. Instead, let’s toast to the defenders. May their arguments be as fortified as their bank accounts, and may their wit always be sharper than their critics’ 🗡.

In the end, it’s not about the money (or so they say); it’s about the glory of the defense. Or perhaps the glory of the paychecks? Only their accountants (assuming they pay taxes on their under-the-table transactions) know for sure. 🕵️‍♂️💼

And to the audience, remember: defending the “Appointed Son of God,” the performances might just be Gawad Urian worthy 🎥🍿. But as for the effectiveness of the defense? Well, that’s a story for another day. 😉