QUEZON CITY, Philippines (The Adobo Chronicles, Quezon City Bureau) – For the longest time, Kabataan Partylist Representative Raoul Manuel never got an answer to a question he raised during a Congressional hearing on whether the Philippines has already reclaimed sabá (Sabah).

Yesterday, Manuel’s question was answered with the release of former Senator Leila de Lima, a.k.a. “Sabá.”

Ah, the whimsical world of political suggestions! 

Richard Heydarian, the maestro of eyebrow-raising proposals, has graced us with another gem—President Bongbong Marcos appointing Leila de Lima to investigate alleged extra-judicial killings. 

Bravo, Mr. Heydarian, for suggesting a move that defies the laws of conflict of interest as gracefully as a cat on a skateboard.

In this surreal spectacle, Heydarian, the virtuoso of irony, seems to have missed the memo on vendettas and ethical quandaries. One can only marvel at the audacity of such a proposal, akin to suggesting a fox guard the henhouse for a refreshing change of perspective.

But fear not, dear audience, for in the carnival of political acrobatics, Heydarian’s suggestion is a dazzling display of contortionist logic that leaves us all wondering if we’ve entered a parallel universe where conflict of interest is a term as obsolete as cassette tapes. 

What’s next, suggesting cats lead investigations into missing mice? The absurdity knows no bounds!