Ah, the curious case of “political analysts” who analyze everything except, well, politics.

Enter Malou Tiquia, the CEO of a polling firm who somehow manages to conduct surveys without common sense as a respondent. Recently, she pondered—bewildered, no less—why Bongbong Marcos is criticizing Rodrigo Duterte when the latter isn’t even running in 2025. Never mind that neither is Marcos. Never mind that elections are won by backing candidates, not by pretending the opposition doesn’t exist. And certainly never mind that the Dutertes have been throwing punches at Marcos long before he decided to return the favor.

Perhaps in Tiquia’s world, political criticism is reserved strictly for those with a COMELEC certificate of candidacy. Or maybe she believes that election campaigns should be peaceful exchanges of friendship bracelets. Either way, it’s an impressive feat: making a career out of analyzing politics while ignoring the most basic rule—elections are about power, not politeness.