Who are you, indeed, to think that the U.S. State Department, the supposed puppet master of global chaos, would bother orchestrating the takedown of a Netherlands-based Filipino blogger’s Facebook page?

We may have our hands full with international diplomacy, but plotting the demise of a blogger nestled comfortably in tulip fields is a bit too niche for our taste. Sass Rogando Sasot’s imagination seems to have taken a scenic detour through conspiracy-land, where every internet glitch is a government plot.

Rest assured, our elite team of meme enthusiasts and social media influencers are far too busy crafting tasteful diplomatic tweets to bother with silencing a blogger. We kindly suggest that Sasot redirect her investigative prowess towards more pressing matters, like finding out who stole the office snacks or deciphering the mysteries of the Bermuda Triangle. 

Meanwhile, we’ll be here, sipping our coffee and contemplating the geopolitical implications of cat videos.