MENLO PARK, California (The Adobo Chronicles, San Jose Bureau) -META/Facebook has declared war on democracy itself!

The social media giant announced that it will suspend account holders daring to use their “story” or profile pictures to campaign for local positions like Barangay captain, Kagawad, or Kabataan representatives.

Apparently, Facebook’s vision of a connected world doesn’t involve any form of political activity. In their generous wisdom, they’ve decreed that those who dare engage in such forbidden democracy will be slapped with a 7-day suspension if they lose the elections and a 14-day vacation if they win.

Who knew that cat memes were the true purpose of social media?