Move over, Manny Pacquiao; there’s a new champion in town, and his name is Alan Peter Cayetano. 

With a record-breaking number of absences in the Senate, Cayetano has proven that when it comes to playing hooky, he’s in a league of his own. Forget about dodging punches in the ring; Cayetano’s mastered the art of dodging responsibilities in the hallowed halls of Congress. 

While Pacquiao may have missed a few sessions while training for fights, Cayetano’s absences seem more like an Olympic-level feat of avoidance. Perhaps he’s been too busy perfecting his disappearing act or attending seminars on the art of evasion. Whatever the case, one thing’s for sure: Cayetano’s absenteeism deserves its own gold medal. 

So, move aside, Pac-Man; there’s a new absentee senator stealing the spotlight, and he’s not showing up anytime soon.