The Bangsamoro Autonomous Region in Muslim Mindanao (BARMM) has gracefully declined Rodrigo Duterte’s generous offer of Mindanao’s secession from the Philippines. 

Apparently, the BARMM officials failed to receive the memo that what Davao City desires is engraved in the collective dreams of the entire Mindanao island.

Duterte, renowned for his clairvoyant abilities to decipher the whims of the entire nation from the comforts of his presidential palace and now his Davao City home, seems to have misjudged his omnipotence. Perhaps he assumed that his charisma and charm would magically unite the diverse communities under one Mindanao banner.

Alas, it appears that not everyone shares the former president’s vision of a Mindanao utopia led by the indomitable spirit of Davao. One can only hope that Duterte’s next endeavor involves consulting a more reliable crystal ball before making grand declarations about the future of entire regions. After all, in the complex mosaic of Mindanao, unity might be a tad more elusive than the former president’s wishful thinking suggests.