Sochi, Russia – Russian President Vladimir Putin was arrested Sunday night for violating his own government’s laws prohibiting the public display of homosexuality.
The arrest came shortly after the Russians won the gold medal in the team skating competition, beating out Canada and the United States. Putin, who was in the audience all evening, rushed to the athletes’ stand and embraced the handsome Evgeni Plushenko.
Putin was booked but later released after making a public apology. “I just could not contain myself, ” he said, “and I am really sorry for bringing embarassment to Russia.”
Sochi, Russia – American figure skater Ashley Wagner took to the ice Saturday to skate to the music of Pink Floyd’s “Shine On You Crazy Diamond,” during the team ladies short program. After weeks of being in the media spotlight because of criticism regarding her being on the U.S. Olympic team, Wagner was focused on one thing and one thing only: to keep the U.S. in contention for a medal in the team figure skating competition.
Then the unexpected happened. When the music played, it wasn’t Pink Floyd at all. It was Russian composer Sergei Rachmaninoff’s “Piano Concerto No. 3.” Apparently, the Russians wanted to sabotage Team U.S.A., sending armed government agents to the sound control booth at the Iceberg Skating Palace. They ordered the sound technician to replace Wagner’s music with the Russian classic.
To her coach’s and teammates’ surprise, Wagner started her routine as if she was skating to her original chosen music. It paid off quite well. Wagner received a composite score of 63.10, skating a clean program and assuring the U.S. team a solid third place going into the finals.
Something may have gone wrong, but Wagner made it right!
Sochi, Russia – The United States is sending its largest-ever contigent to a winter Olympics, with 230 athletes competing in Sochi. But there is a bigger story.
When the American Olympians enter the stadium at Friday’s opening ceremony, each will carry an open bottle of Russian vodka. As soon as they reach the front of the VIP stand, they will pour the vodka into the parade grounds.
The reason? It is to protest the embargo by the Russian government of a shipment of Chobani Greek yogurt which was supposed to be fed to the U.S. athletes while in Sochi. The yogurt shipment is in limbo at a New Jersey airport. The U.S. government has accused the Russians of using this nutritious food as a vehicle to show who’s in charge.
To counter the U.S. public protest, Russian officials have mandated that all American athletes undergo a blood test two hours before their respective scheduled competitions to detect even the slightest trace of vodka in their system. “Intimidation tactics,” one U.S. Olympic official said.