Category Archives: Government

HILLARY PICKS BILL CLINTON AS VP RUNNING MATE!

image
Photo: http://www.periodicodigital.mx

NEW YORK, New York (The Adobo Chronicles) – While Republicans are struggling to pick their nominee for president in the 2016 U.S. presidential elections, the Democrats are in a conundrum on who will be their vice presidential nominee.

But it is up to Hillary Clinton, not the Democrats, to pick her running mate. On Sunday, Clinton officially declared her candidacy for president. No other Democrat has expressed any desire to challenge Clinton.

Today, in her home state of New York, Hillary announced that she has picked husband Bill to be her running mate.

The U.S. Constitution limits the presidential term to a total of eight years, so Bill is ineligible to run again for president. But the constitution says nothing about a two-term president running for vice president!

Capitalizing on this constitutional loophole, Hillary picked her husband as her VP running mate.

“I think this would be the ultimate dream team; ” Hillary told reporters, “the American people will get two presidents for the price of one!”

There are amendments to the constitution that vaguely address whether or not a former two-term president can seek the vice presidency, and the Republican National Committee — caught offguard by Hillary’s announcement — is scrambling to challenge her choice of running mate.

The final decision may eventually rest with the U.S. Supreme Court.

In the meantime, Americans get two “everyday heroes.” Clinton and Clinton.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Advertisements

U.S. LEADS IN MASSIVE CLEAN-UP OF THE PHILIPPINES

imageMANILA, Philippines (The Adobo Chronicles) – Last year, the  United States and the Philippines signed a 10-year defense agreement, considered by many as one of the clearest signs yet of renewed American engagement in the region at a time when tensions between China and its neighbors have been rising.

The agreement will entail moving American ships and planes to the Philippines more frequently as well as engaging in more training exercises with the country’s forces.

But a little-known provision in this pact is a firm commitment from the Americans to help the Philippines with the much-needed clean-up of the country’s environmental and political filth.

Today, U.S. Ambassador Philip Goldberg led hundreds of Filipino volunteers to undertake a massive clean-up of Manila’s Pasig River, known for many decades now for its polluted water and garbage-filled river banks. This dire situation has all but exacerbated the problem of perennial flooding in the metropolis.

Members of the international diplomatic corps also participated in today’s civic engagement project.

In talking to reporters after the day-long clean-up project, Goldberg said this was jut the beginning of many more projects schduled this year.

“Next, we will undertake a massive clean up of Philippine Congress, then Malacanang (the presidential palace), and finally the judiciary,” he said.

He was, of course, talking about political — not environmental — filth, including, but not limited to, the pork barrel scam, government curruption, the Aquino administration’s inefficiency, and justice for sale.

TOP 10 REASONS THERE WILL NEVER BE A WOMAN U.S. PRESIDENT

imageSAN FRANCISCO, California (The Adobo Chronicles) – Now that Hillary Clinton has officially declared she is running for president in 2016,  the political and media circles have begun the unending debate on whether or not America is ready for a woman President.

We at The Adobo Chronicles maintain that there will never ever be a woman president in the U.S., and here’s why:

  1. There is no official title for a woman president’s husband at The White House.
  2. The American military will never take orders from a woman Commander-in-Chief.
  3. The White House has never dealt with maternity leave for as long as we all can remember.
  4. Presidents are fitted with dark suits, not dark pantsuits.
  5. Air Force One does not have a stall, only a urinal, for the bathroom on board. Marine One does not have a bathroom at all.
  6.  Our founding fathers didn’t have mothers in mind when they established the Union.
  7. There cannot be two women in the White House kitchen. The current executive chef is already a woman, Filipina-American Cristeta Comerford.
  8. A woman president can take a 3 a.m. call in her pajamas, but will always be late for a 7 a.m. meeting or appointment.
  9. Politicians and the media will never criticize a woman president, lest they be accused of being sexist.
  10. We do not want a repeat of that international embarassment when George W. Bush was caught on camera giving German Chancellor Angela Merkel a back rub. We would not allow that to happen to our woman president!